Master
by Ryan-Ookami
Summary: Jounouchi-kun wakes up blindfolded in a strange place. Jou/Kaiba. Warnings: dark, mild language, lime scented. **FINISHED!**
1. Puppy

A/N:Hi, it's me, taking a break from my regular activities about making Jou a werewolf. Can't do only that for a living. Fierce Child will be continued soon however (for those interested. I love my Jou-wolf and can't leave him alone too long!) Anyways, I wrote this little sadistic number 'cause I've read a LOT of fluff lately, and I wanted something definitly NOT fluffy!! There is mild lime. This fic is dark and disturbing. You have been warned! (mild swearing)  
  
***  
  
~*Master*~  
  
He struggled fitfully against his bonds, nimble fingers searching out for a lock or knot, anything that could be undone. He found nothing. The blindfold covering his eyes hid the world from him, but he was clever enough to make a few perceptions. The air was dank and hard to breath, he must be under ground, in a cellar or some such place. He was laying on something soft, not a bed, perhaps a pallet or a foam matress. His hands had been bound firmly together, almost enough to cut off circulation, certainly enough to make his wrists bleed as he struggled.  
  
Jounouchi tried to turn himself over, he was too vulnerable on his stomach. If he got on his back he could at least kick out to try and defend himself. Defend himself against what? Jou couldn't be sure. He had been running along the street, it had been pretty late. After having gotten his ass kicked several times by Yugi in some duels he'd headed home. Perhaps he'd stayed out to late, he might have gotten home and gotten knocked out by his father, but the old man had never tied him up before. Plus, since Jou couldn't remember getting home something must've happened before. His head hurt and he could taste blood in his mouth since he'd first woken up. He'd come in and out of consciousness several times, he couldn't be sure how much time had passed. Considering how much his head hurt it couldn't have been more than a few hours. He took a deep breath and put all his energy into flipping over, at least on to his side, and he could go from there. Pain shot like lightning through his side and he was sure a rib or two must be broken. Jou swore under his breath for a moment and continued to squirm himself into a more upright position. By the time he was on his back and half-sitting he was sweating profusely and swearing furiously in the darkness.  
  
A short series of claps startled Jounouchi from his obsenities. Someone was applauding him? "What the--Who the hell is there!?! What the fu-" he was cut of when a strong hand slapped him full across the jaw, knocking his head back. Jou tried to shoot out with one leg and catch the bastard, assuming it was a guy, in the shins, but without vision it didn't work well. He panted loudly in the stillness, his ears trying desperately to follow the sound of his attacker through the room. The sound of something being dragged across the floor came to him, it stopped close by.  
  
Jounouchi was pulled upwards roughly, bringing a scream to his lips due to his injuries. Jou hated showing any weaknesses right about now, but it hurt like hell! He scowled darkly and struggled in his captors arms. Something cold was pulled tight across his neck and Jou thought he just might be about to die. The idea of being killed by some coward in some dark place where no one would ever find him made Jou more than angry. He thrashed suddenly and jerked away from the hands that held him.  
  
He stepped away quickly and tried to reach a wall or anything, hopefully a door. There wasn't mush to guide him but a faint light he could see from underneath the edge of his blindfold. The temporary freedom didn't last long as he ran headfirst into his captor's arms. "Shit." Jou muttered.  
  
The hands shoved him down and held him there, he could feel soft hands tangling in his hair. One long finger brushed against his cheek and Jou pulled back instinctivly. He was awarded with another slap. The taste of blood became strong in his mouth again and Jou had to spit some of it out in order to breath. A low chuckle greeted this. Jou looked up in shock. Even with the blindfold firmly in place he KNEW that chuckle. That arrogent I'm-sooo-better-than-you goddam chuckle!! "KAIBA!!" he hollered in fury up at his captor and the CEO of Kaiba Corp. "What th' hell are you doin'??? Lemme go!!" Jounouchi demanded in low tones.  
  
"You shouldn't talk that way to your master, puppy."  
  
"Master?" Jou snorted in derision. "Like hell you'd ever be--"another slap sent him reeling.  
  
"You will obey me puppy. I'll see to it." the other teen hissed quietly.  
  
Jounouchi wondered absently if he was somewhere in the Kaiba Mansion, if he screamed would Mokuba hear him? Knowing Kaiba he'd have anticipated such an action. Jou was probably no wheres near Mokuba, or anyone else, screaming for help would only get him slapped again.  
  
Jou still tried his best to face Kaiba. "Let. Me. Go." he said as levelly as possible, ennunciating each word.  
  
Kaiba chuckled again. "I doubt it puppy. You don't get to come out of here until you've been properly trained. It's better if you learn quickly mutt. I'm patient, but you're not and this could take along while." Jou heard something clatter down beside him. "I will be back later puppy to commence your learning, for now you can help yourself to dinner.  
  
The blindfold was suddenly pulled off his face and he was greeted with the sight of Seto Kaiba glaring down at him, a smirk plastered across his face. Jounouchi didn't want to give the rich teen the satisfaction of seeing him lose his cool, so Jou simply stared back his eyes burning with hatred. Kaiba turned quickly, his coat flapping out behind him and left the room. Jou could clearly hear the soft snick of the lock, closing him in alone again.  
  
Jou looked down at the object beside him on the floor and yelped in surprize. On a small tray two ceramic bowls sat, each with the word 'Puppy' labelled across the front. One bowl held a generous helping of water, Jou didn't particularily want to know what was exactly in the other. It was brown and lumpy and the smell it gave off was distinctly unpleasant. Dog food. Kaiba had given him a bowl of dog food. What the hell was happening here? Jou's head spun and he felt like he was about to be sick. He was being held by Kaiba and for some sick reason being treated like a dog. He knew Kaiba like to taunt him by calling him puppy and chihuahua, sometimes mutt, it varied. This was going too far, it was some kind of sick game now, and Jou didn't know what the stakes were just now.  
  
After staring down at the bowls for several minutes Jou realized with disgust that Kaiba had done something further to degrade him. If Jou actually wanted to eat, or drink-which he did-he'd have to bend over and lick it from the bowls. He struggled with his hands again, but it didn't do anything but start his wrists to bleeding again. Jou was fairly convinced that there would be a camera in the room somewhere sp that Kaiba could watch him, and Jou didn't want to give Kaiba the satisfaction of seeing Jou try to drink from the water bowl. Jou leaned back against the wall and sighed deeply. Hi head and wrists hurt, now so did his jaw, and he was being held somewhere by Kaiba. Jou gritted his teeth, there was NO way he was going to give in to whatever it was Kaiba wanted. Yugi and everyone would realize he was missing eventually, his friends knew him well enough to know he wouldn't just disappear on them.  
  
Jou sighed again and shuffled on his knees over the pallet on the ground. Careful of his side he laid down gently and stared miserably at his prison until a fitfull dream-filled sleep finally over took him.  
  
***  
  
Hands grabbed him firmly by the shoulders and he was tossed across the room. The blindfold had been replaced. Jou moaned and tried to roll over, he felt wetness beneath him and realized he'd hit his water bowl. He was jerked upwards by the hair and punched in the stomach. "You will eat the food your master has seen fit to give you mutt!" Kaiba's voice said close to his ear, it had a dangerous cold edge to it, even more so than normal. His face was pushed down roughly and the smell became overpowering. Kaiba forced his face into the disgusting bowl of dog food and Jou's only option soon became eat or suffocate. After a few seconds of contemplation Jou decided he still treasure his ass and was intent on saving it, even if it was only so he could get revenge on Kaiba. That alone was a good reason to keep living for now.  
  
Scrunching up his face in determination, Jou began to eat the food he was being held down in. It tasted somewhat slimy and juicy, an altogether unplesant combination. The pieces of meat themselves weren't in actuality that bad, it was whatever the hell they were swimming in. After several mouthfuls his head was pulled back up and he breathed heavily, glad to pull air back into his lungs. A hand softly stroked his hair, like a master petting his dog. Jou wanted to scream out or do something, but he took the petting in stride. Now wasn't the time, even if he pulled back he'd get hit and he couldn't fight back. Yet. Jou determined that as soon as he got one hand free he'd sock Kaiba to hell and back. He'd break the bastard's spine if he could. Jou was fairly certain at this point he'd be able to.  
  
"That's a good puppy." Kaiba said quietly, an odd note to his voice. His hands trailed down from Jou's hair to stroke his cheeks. "You deserve a drink now." Jou was prepared to be forced down face first into another bowl, but instead felt the rim of a glass placed against his lips. He tilted his head back and drank gratefully, the water was blessedly cold and felt so good in his aching throat. The petting and stroking never ceased. "That's enough now puppy, too much and you might get sick." Jou glowered, as if the water would make him sick, didn't Kaiba remember forcing him to eat that dog food all of two minutes ago??  
  
Jounouchi heard a faint rustling from beside him and then he was pulled forwards against what he assumed was a the table Kaiba had brought in the room earlier. Jou remembered having looked at it only momentarily, not sure why his captor had brought it for him. He just hadn't paid attention to it. Kaiba pushed him down roughly across the table and then undid the bindings on Jou's hands. The blonde was so surprized by the sudden freedom he didn't act, just sat there in confusion. His hands were stretched painfully in front of him and then lashed down to the table. A lump grew in Jounouchi's throat and a panicked feeling began to worm it's way inside his stomach.  
  
His side seemed to scream in pain as he was stretched out and pushed down. Kaiba grabbed one of his legs and pulled it aside, securing it firmly to the table's leg. He repeated the procedure on the other side. Faintly Jounouchi could hear Kaiba chuckling. "I finally have you my puppy. I am your master, you will understand that." his cold voice whisper breathily in the nothingness outside the blindfold. A hand came down on his back and grabbed at the material of his jacket, the soft noise of tearing came after as his clothing was cut from his body. Jou tried to pull away, thoughts fleeing his mind save the instinct to run. He tried to thrash against the table, to break the lashes that held him down. Kaiba laughed.  
  
"Are we scared puppy? It's okay, your master will see to you." It seemed to Jou as though Kaiba might just have gone and flipped his lid. More so than before.  
  
Kaiba's hand trailed down Jounouchi's bare skin, making his flesh prickle in a distinctinely unpleasant manner. Kaiba tugged firlmy at the waistband of his jeans, and then he placed the cold blade of the scissors inside and began to force his way through the sturdy fabric, pulling at it roughly as he cut it away. Jou wasn't sure if he was crying by now, the blindfold would have absorbed any tears he shed. He didn't want to show any weakness, it was a principle of his life to remain strong no matter what he faced, but Jou had never expected this of all things.  
  
Once Kaiba had cut away enough of his pants to be satisfied Jou felt his hands on his back again, the long fingers tracing obscure patterns across his skin. "If you don't fight it doesn't have to hurt that much puppy. You can fight if you want, but in time you will learn how pointless it is."  
  
Jou gritted his teeth together to stop from sobbing. He had thought himself able to face anything and come away smiling, but this was destroying him inside. His stomach curdled and he wanted to be sick, hoped to be sick, but nothing came. His heart was beating so fast that it hurt, he could feel the rythm pounding through his ears. He wanted to cry so badly, to scream and holler and make a fuss, but nothing came. He couldn't, if he did Kaiba would only make him hurt worse, destroy him more.  
  
He swallowed a deep breath of air in surprize as he felt Kaiba's hardness pressed against him. Kaiba was really going to go through with it, this wasn't just some game, the CEO was dead serious. Joey moaned, holding back a large scream, as Kaiba pushed roughly inside him. He could feel the ragged breath of the other teen on his back. Kaiba began to thrust forcefully inside Jou, tearing him and making him bleed. He could feel the wetness of his blood begin to flow down his thighs. Kaiba was panting hard, his thrusts coming faster and harder. His finger dug into the soft flesh around Jounouchi's neck, scratching him deeply. The brunette spasmed fitfully as he came, his breath exploding outwards. He slumped over his victim, and softly kissed the flesh between Jounouchi's shoulder blades.  
  
He pulled out and stood up, cleaning himself off before redressing. "You were good puppy. You'll get better in time, you will learn how to please your master." Jou felt Kaiba's hands working at the bindings that held him straped to the table. Jounouchi felt the hotness of Kaiba's breath before the other kissed him, shoving his tongue forcefully into Jou's mouth. The blindfold was pulled away and Kaiba looked with his icy eyes at his puppy. "You be good and you will be treated well. Disobey..." he left it hanging ominously. "I'll leave you unbound for now. You've earned a small reward. Be good and don't remove your collar."  
  
Jou's hands went uncertainly to his neck. A band of metal encircled his neck, he could feel that it was shaped somehow, decorative he assumed, and a small tag hung down. He assumed the tag would match his bowls. He looked up questioningly at Kaiba, he couldn't disguise the fear and hurt in his eyes.  
  
"I see you are beginning to comprehend what's going on here. You are mine, Jounouchi, now and forever." With that Kaiba stepped back outside and closed the door again.  
  
Unable to help himself Jou crawled naked and bleed back to his makeshift bed and cried into his pillow, a few soft whimpers escaping him. He was Kaiba's, now and forever.  
  
***  
  
A/N: There you have it. Nice and dark and all that kinda stuff. I've just read WAY too many fics where for some reason Kaiba suddenly becomes this wonderfully nice caring person towards Jounouchi-kun. Some authors tackle this well, others just bullshit their way through it and have it happen too easily. I still loved to read such fics since Jou/Kaiba is my fave couple (I also like Jou/Yugi, but that's almost all fluffy, but it fits the coupling.) Go ahead and flame me, I don't care. Reviews though are welcome. If enough people like it and want this to be more than a one shot (and providing I get inspiration) I'll write more. See ya! 


	2. Broken

I have no clue what happened format wise!!! It cut out over three quarters of the chapter!!!!!!!!!GRR!  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the collar Jou is wearing. I'd collar him myself if I could! (not to toture, he'd just look so cute with a collar and little wolfy-puppy ears and a fluffy tail!!!)  
  
***  
  
He whimpered softly as he woke, his golden eyes opening slowly. It was a reluctant awakening, he wished desperately to remain asleep. His dreams gave him some escape from what was now his life. He curled inwards upon himself as his master stepped inside, a tray held in his hands.  
  
"Good morning puppy." Kaiba greeted softly, his eyes peering down gently at his pet.  
  
Puppy got up from his pallet and made his way to his master on all fours and bent down infront of him, head bowed in submission. Kaiba knelt beside him and placed his breakfast tray on the floor before seeking the comfort of a nearby chair. Grimacing inside the puppy bent over his food and obediantly began to eat. He'd long since learned the punishment for not being good and eating what was given. Having starved for three days tends to do that to a person.  
  
After the meal was completed he washed himself off with the cloth provided and checked himself over in the mirror. He hated that damn mirror, but after having broken two and having them replaced, he'd given up. He was thin and tired, it showed in the haggardness of his face. His blonde hair hung limply across his forhead and his eyes were flat and dull like mud. He looked away quickly, not able to bear the look of deafeat in his eyes. He was broken now, he knew that, could recognize it within himself. Kaiba had won whatever game they were playing, he had suceeded in making Jou his puppy. He couldn't be sure what his friends would think, what they thought about his disappearance. Jou wasn't even sure how long he'd been locked in this room, his master his only contact outside.  
  
Kaiba sat a few feet away, still gloating over how quickly he had come to posess the other boy, to own his body and soul completely. Jou was a broken creature now, the dog that Kaiba had known him to be. Kaiba basked in his sense of pride. He had overcome Jou and put him in his place. His obsession with the blonde had reached it's peak and now he owned the other, could do as he pleased with him. Kaiba hadn't had much time for others, and the weakness of showing love for another, other than his brother, was contemptable. Still, he had his needs. Like any good dog, his mutt would have to see to those needs, to please his master. Kaiba smile as his puppy approached him, his eyes hurt and downcast. The cold CEO reached out one hand and petted Jou's blonde locks affectionately. "It's about time for a bath, wouldn't you say, Puppy?"  
  
Jou looked up in surprize, his dark eyes flashing with confusion. He looked away after a moment, careful never to stare too long at his master. "I-If that's what you want master." the pup said softly, his hands knotting around each other in his lap. Kaiba smiled, he liked to keep his pet off balance. "Come along then puppy, you don't want to keep me waiting." the brunette stood abruptly and headed towards the door. As he stepped outside he began to walk away without closing the door.  
  
Jou's frightened mind screamed at him to stay still, to await some further command. This was certainly some trick that Kaiba was pulling, daring him to come out, to leave his cage. Jou stood shakily, not having been allowed to walk properly in days. The door was so close, he took several hesitant steps to reach it and leaned heavily against the door frame. It was cooler in the hall, making his flesh prickle at the coldness. His cage had always been shut up, the air muggy and stifling after awhile. He peered out into the hallway, it was nicely appointed but not anything too special. The floor was carpeted in rich red, it felt strange to have something soft beneath his feet.  
  
"Are you going to stand there gawking all day?" Kaiba called out peevishly from the end of the hallway. There were a few towels thrown over his arm. Jou blinked. Kaiba must have truly meant what he had said. Jou deeply felt the need for a bath right now, the need to cleanse himself, although hot water couldn't wear away all his pains, it would do for now. He took a deep breath of the refreshing air and walked quickly down the hall to where his master waited. The lights were nearly blinding for him and he hated it, shielding his eyes he reached out to his master and let the CEO lead him where he would.  
  
Still uncertain, Jou stumbled several times as he was pulled along. Each time Kaiba would stop and help him up and give him a reassuring pat on the head. It burned inside that Jounouchi had to admit the soft hand made him feel better, that his master's approval could matter so much. He hated his situation and hated himself. He had thought himself to be so strong, so independant, but in only a few days Kaiba had broken him down completely and turned him into a sniveling slave. He hurt and was lonely enough that the visits from his master, the attention he was given made him feel better. Jou couldn't understand how his feelings could be manipulated so easily, how he could feel such gratefulness to the person who had gone about destroying him. He responded because he had no choice. Jounouchi Katsuya had been pushed away into the back of his mind and been replaced by Kaiba's creature, a pet dependant upon it's master. Jounouchi wanted to cry from such bitter realizations, but tears refused to come. The only time now he found he could cry was after one of Kaiba's nightly visits. It had always been the same, he'd been woken blindfolded, hurled violently at that damnable table. Jou shuddered. He didn't want to think of such things now, he just wanted to get a bath and try for a few moments at least to forget.  
  
Kaiba watched his pet silently as they moved through the lowest level of his house. He could see the trouble and bitterness in Jou's eyes, but most of all he saw defeat. It pleased him to no end. He thought about it every night and woke up to it each morning, it filled his dreams inbetween. He owned this boy, made him into something else completely, something that pleased him. Occassionally he could see hatred in the blonde's eyes, but he would work at it and wear it away until all that was left was need. Jou tried hard not to display such need, but Kaiba was an expert at reading other people's emotions. When he patted his pet, or gave im kind words those deep chocolate eyes would light up for a moment before going dull and frightened again. Kaiba smiled. It was what he wanted, to have the boy need him, to make Jounouchi live and breath for his pleasure and him alone. He would be his puppy's life, the only thing that mattered. Friends and family would fade into a forgotten past and Kaiba would be all that was left. Jou was already showing such signs of hoplessness, of cosigning himself to the fate Kaiba had planned for him. Only a little bit more would be required to push him off the deep end completely.  
  
"We're here." Kaiba said as he stopped before a wide oaken door to one side of the hallway. He reached into the pocket of his dark pants and pulled out a key. It fit snuggly in the lock and soon the door was open. Jou absently wondered why Kaiba would keep his bathroom locked, wouldn't that be a hassel if you really had to go? There were probably plenty more baths in the mansion, so perhaps it was just this one. Jou bitterly thought it that if he tested all the doors in this hallway they would be locked. Even if he escaped his little cage he'd be faced with a whole new problem. The hallway had no windows and the house was like a maze. Even if he got out he'd still have to find someway out of the mansion, and then off the Kaiba grounds. Jou shoulders slumped. His situation was impossible and no one knew where he was. He'd toyed with ideas of escape during his imprisonment, but to see this virtually killed all his made-up plans. He sighed and walked into the bathroom.  
  
It was large and done in shades of dark blue. The tiles seemed coated in a pearlessence that made them gleam in the candlelight. Jou blinked and groaned inside, wary of what his master might want from him next. The tub was large and filled to overflowing almost with bubbles. A bottle of champagne lay in an ice bucket to one side along with a covered tray. Candles lay on almost every available surface in the room. In honesty Jou prefered the candles to the harsh fluorescent lights that were on the ceiling and above the mirror. His eyes hurt already from the walk down the hall and the candles cast only a dim brightness that didn't hurt nearly as much.  
  
"Well?" Kaiba prompted impatiently. "I went to a lot of trouble puppy. You've been good enough to earn this reward, I want to see you start enjoying it."  
  
Jou looked over his shoulder at the tall brunette and then back to the tub in confusion. Was anything else expected of him other than to go sit in the tub? He couldn't be sure, his master wasn't giving him enough clues about what was truly going on here. The whole atmosphere suggested something more than a simple bath. His hands reached up to undo the metal collar, but they were swatted away.  
  
"You don't ever remove that collar puppy, don't even think about it." Kaiba said cooly "You're good enough as is, just hop in.  
  
Jou took his cue and moved over to the large basin, and hefted himself over in the thick bubbles. He slid delightedly down the side of the tub and nearly submerged himself in the blessedly warm water. For the first time in days he began to feel some warmth inside again. After having not been allowed to wear any clothing but his collar it was nice to feel such warmth again, he was also looking forward to being wrapped in towels afterwards. Perhaps if he behaved then his master would allow him some clothing soon so that he could cover himself. He felt very vulnerable when naked, especially while Kaiba's eyes creeped openly along his body, he really wanted to have something to wear again, some small measure of protection.  
  
He sighed deeply and laid back, allowing the water and bubbles to do their thing. He was only absently aware of Kaiba stroking his fingers through Jounouchi's hair. Jou paid no attention and focused on pretending he were somewhere else, some-when else. Hopefully the future, but his mind tried to tell him it was all the past. Kaiba's soft hands were the only promise of the future to come. A glass was passed around infront of him and Jou took it gladly. He didn't care for champagne all that much, having only drank it once at some dumb wedding he'd attended, but was grateful for anything offered in a glass rather than bowl.  
  
"Strawberry?" Kaiba offered solicitously, bringing a silver tray around to Jou's side, it was heaped with ripe red strawberries. Despite his dwindling pride Jou practically dove at the strawberries, fitting as many into his mouth as possible. It was the first real food he'd even seen since coming here, and he took in as much as possible. Kaiba tapped him firmly across the nose and in spite of himself Jou growled. Kaiba chuckled. "Ah-ah puppy, you must at least pretend you know what manners are. If you don't eat properly I won't let you have any more." Kaiba taunted him lightly. Jou could see the enjoyment in those icy blue eyes, the satisfaction Kaiba was taking from this game. Jou choked down the pile of strawberries in his mouth and calmly took one more from the pile and popped it in his mouth. He chewed carefully and swallowed.  
  
"See. I can be good." He regretted the words as soon as he'd uttered them, they sounded just like what a dog would say, it sounded like he was trying to please Kaiba. Wasn't he though? He needed to keep Kaiba happy, he didn't want to be hurt any worse. He cast his eyes downwards and sat in uncomfortable silence, hating and berating himself for becoming such a damn dog. Kaiba grasped his face by the chin and pulled him into a kiss. He licked Jou's lips afterwards, enjoying the sweet taste of the berries that lingered.  
  
"You've been very good, I'm glad you understand how important that is my puppy." He reached down to the flor and grabbed a washcloth. "You sit and enjoy your treat while I bathe you." Jou pulled away instinctively, but firm hands pulled him back roughly and held him fast as Kaiba proceeded to wash him. The CEO seemed to be obsessive about cleanliness and washed the blonde throughly, making sure every pat was washed and double washed. He particularily liked washing the blonde's hair, it was soft and when clean it almost shone golden.  
  
Jou got up from the bath clean, but feeling even dirtier than when he had entered. To have Kaiba tie him down and rape him was one thing, but to let him do this as well? It made Jou shudder. He tried to stand as best he could to cover himself. Kaiba only laughed again. His master took the same care in drying him off as he did in cleaning, then took his puppy's hand and led him from the room. Jou looked back once at the towels laying neatly in the hamper, Kaiba even folded dirty laundry, but he didn't dare ask for clothing right now. He was uncertain how to proceed. Kaiba could be kindly at times, giving him slight presents and such, or complementing him on various things. His hair in particular, Jou noticed, not that it mattered, he hadn't had anything to do with how his hair was, thank genetics. The first gift Kaiba had seen fit to give him was his dueling deck. Jou marvelled at how Kaiba had managed to get hold of it, it thought it must just be replicated by Kaiba, the CEO knew all the cards Jou owned. It was doggeared and worn in all the proper places, his Magic Arm Shield card even had that stain on the corner from when he'd spilt his coke while toying with the deck. It really was his. Such a gesture was very Kaiba-esque, to actually get Jou his deck, not that he gave the boy a chance to use it.  
  
"Sit puppy." Kaiba commanded suddenly as he pulled Jou into his room. Without even thinking he did as he was told, bowing down to sit on his haunches before his master. Kaiba pulled up the chair and sat down, crossing one leg casually over the other, his hands resting along his shin. They sat in silence for several minutes, Jou looking at the floor and Kaiba looking at him, neither moved or spoke. "Tell me you love me, puppy."  
  
Jou's head rocked back in astonishment. Love?? What the hell was Kaiba talking about. Jou paused took long, one long arm reached out and belted him across his gaping jaw. Jou rubbed his face absently and still looked wonderingly at Kaiba. "I-I love you Master." he said quietly after a moment, not trusting the wild look in the CEO's eyes.  
  
Kaiba smiled lightly, a strange look on his face. "Good. You'd do anything for me, right Puppy?"  
  
Jou nodded dumbly.  
  
"Say it." the hissed demand came.  
  
Jou swallowed hard. "I'd do anything for you Master." Jou had long since found out it wasn't good to forget to put 'Master' at the end of responses. Kaiba reached out and ket ine hand trail down Jou's smooth chest, blue eys far away and unreadable.  
  
"Go to your table puppy."  
  
Everything inside Jou screamed not to obey, he wouldn't willingly let this happen. His body however responded to the command before checking in with his conscious mind. "Strap yourself in." Jou blinked and looked down at the table, the one end crusted with his dried blood. He could feel the strawberries rising in his stomach and he felt weak and dizzy. This time his body refused also to comply with his master's wishes. Kaiba stood quickly and kicked Jounouchi in the stomach, his light eyes still indecipherable. Jou groaned and hunched over in pain, unable to fight it as his legs were held down and strapped into the accustomed place. His arms were jerked roughly in front of him and secured against the table. Jou tried to steel himself for what he knew would come next, but instead a scream ripped through him as his back exploded in pain. He looked over his should through tears that blurred his vision and saw Kaiba standing there with a belt in hand. Jou watched as the CEO raised it over his should and quickly cut across sideways, sending the strip of leather hurtling towards Jou at a ferocious speed. It stung and Jou moaned and thrashed as the belt came down against his soft unprotected skin. It bit deeply into his back and his backside, he could feel the hot blood streaming from the lashes. Kaiba continued on, seemingly maddened, for over half an hour before he quit, sending one last blow that struck Jou from shoulder blade to waistline. Jou sobbed into the hard surface of the table, trying to pull himself away from reality, to will his mind somewhere else.  
  
Kaiba pulled him up roughly as he undid the lashes, grabbing Jou's face so hard that his fingernails caught and left bleeding scratches on his cheeks. Those dead blue eyes stared angrily for uncountable moments before thrusting him backwards violently. Jounouchi struck the edge of the table, ripping a new scream from his throat as the lashes burned deeper it seemed.  
  
Kaiba threw the belt down angrily and stalked across the small interior of the room, his hands flexing into fists. Jou sat holding himself, his mind terrified and not making sense. He wanted to run, wanted to attack, wanted to apologize and a whole other list of actions all at once. All he found he could do though was sit and sob. He hated that he cried so much, that he felt so weak, but the tears refused to stop. His breathing was hot and harsh and he desperatly wanted water.  
  
Kaiba stopped infront of him, looking down at his pet, a scowl etched deeply across his features. Jou noticed in horror that Kaiba had an erection. The torture had turned him on. Jou wanted to scream, to wail, but he was still too busy sobbing. Kaiba reached down and slapped him, somewhat bringing him to his senses. He pulled Jounouchi to his knees before him and shoved the blonde's face towards his hardness. "Do it." he said harshly, not looking down at the other boy. Jou nodded dumbly and reached up to undo the zipper. His mind moved on in autopilot mode as he took the length into his mouth, trying to please Master, trying to avoid anymore hurt. Kaiba moaned deeply in pleasure, one hand gripping the wall to steady him as the blonde sucked deeply upon his hardness, taking it all in. jou continued to kiss and suck the other teen as he approached climax, Kaiba grabbed his hair and held him to make sure he would take all Kaiba would give. He swallowed hard, trying once again to stop from being sick before Kaiba let him go.  
  
The CEO did his pants back up and left without a word, closing Jounouchi alone into the darkness once again. Alone and frightened Junouchi screamed in terror and hurt, wasted screams that no one heard except his master. Tucked away in his bedroom Kaiba leaned back in bed and smiled as he listened to his puppy howling in the dark.  
  
****  
  
Geez....I'm just making this worse. Poor Jou. Anyways, there might be more, I think. Depends on inspiration. Feel free to make suggestions, but keep in mind I might not be able to use them, gotta actually be able to write and sometimes it never happens how you want it to. Thanks again all my little reviewers, I loves ya all!! (hugs my Jou-ookami plushie....how the hell can I be doing this to my favourite character? Geez, I'm destroying the poor guy's sanity. I think Kaiba's sanity disappeared a long time ago. As for the torture thing, well, it often runs in family lines type thing, Kaiba was tortured by Gozaburo, so he's torturing Jou-kun. These things happen....but it does help explain Kaiba's cruelty in this fic.) See ya! 


	3. Taking Leave

A/N: The third chapter is here. Hopefully it will post right, if not review right away and tell me so I can fix it like last time. I never would've know if my reviewers hadn't thankfully pointed it out. Hope you enjoy, this chapter goes a little fast and a little weird. Despite what the first part of our chapter seems to indicate we ain't over yet. Also, Kaiba is still going to remain a coldhearted bastard, just a slightly repentant bastard, but for his own selfish reasons.  
  
Disclaimer; I own nothing.  
  
****  
  
Jounouchi stared up wonderingly at the sky, his eyes shining brightly in the darkness. Night had long since descended and the stars were beautiful pinpricks of light in the vast velvet blackness above. A soft breeze ruffled through his hair, bringing with it the soft scent of night flowers, slowly opening to let their loveliness be absorbed by the darkness.  
  
Jou smiled, his eyes blurry and tears still trailing down his cheeks. It was nice, so real. He formed every picture perfectly and lovingly in his mind's eye, sparing no detail. He could imagine the colours within the colourlessness of the sky, the sweet scents of the flowers he created. He made a perfect world and retreated inside himself, shutting out the pain and unhappiness of the real world. He was getting quite good at pretending, at ignoring the outside, the things his body tried to convey to his mind. He was away from it all though, caught up in the saga of his wonderful imaginary life.  
  
This unexpected turn of events displeased Kaiba to no end. He'd certainly meant to break the boy, but to this extent? He often walked in his puppy's cage to find the mutt talking to people who weren't there. Certainly more frightening was the fact that Kaiba suspected these invisible people didn't actually exist outside Jou's wounded mind. He had never caught him talking to friends, not even Yugi, Jou seemed to have retreated from everything his life had ever held. He was a completely different person now, gone far beyond what Kaiba had intended. Jounouchi Katsya had been swallowed by darkness and this frightening stranger remained locked in his place, another person staring out from behind those soft chocolate eyes. Kaiba retreated often from the boy, unable to face this new person that he had help to create. Scary as it was Kaiba could admit that he actually missed Jounouchi, the brash explosive kid he'd sought to tame. He'd tamed him alright, tamed and executed. Kaiba knew nothing of this new Jounouchi and didn't want to find out. He took everything passivly, no matter what Kaiba did to hurt him the boy accepted without changing expression. Jou always looked dazed, somewhere else, and he was usually crying. He wasn't loud, wasn't sobbing, but his cheeks were always wet with recently shed tears. The mutt probably wasn't even aware that he was crying.  
  
As he watched Jou from the doorway the puppy smiled at him and sat up, seemingly at attention, his eyes said otherwise though. They were soft and heavy lidded, the way he was looking they seemed out of focus. Jou never actually looked directly in Kaiba's eyes, he seemed to stare at something beyond him. Kaiba knew perfectly well, since he had investigate and made sure, there was absolutely nothing of any interest on the rough brick wall. What ever Jou saw was not there. The cold icy ice burned into the flat brown ones, trying to detect some movement of feeling or emotion stirring beneath the placid surface. It was no use, Jou was a pretty shallow pool at the moment, whatever lay beneath the exterior was as lifeless as what showed outside.  
  
The boy got to his feet unsteadily and came to kneel before his master, a light grin across his blank features. If only those eyes would tell him something, Kaiba thought angrily, if they showed anything then perhaps the real Jou still lived somewhere inside his puppet. Graceful hands moved up along Kaiba's pant leg, fingers eagerly gripping his belt and beginning to unfasten it. Kaiba pulled away as if burned, loathing the look and feel of his slave, not wanting the dead boy to touch him.  
  
Jounouchi's didn't change his position or expresson, his hands simply fell limply to his sides and he continued to stare upwards, ready to preform whatever task given to him. His mind and body were numb, ready to eagerly obey his master if it meant living through another day. The essence of Jounouchi Katsuya was too far away to care or even notice what he was doing. Whomever occupied the controll room of his mind had drifted to sleep and left the autopilot on to take care of the day-to-day matters of keeping his body up and running.  
  
Kaiba shuddered. Hating himself, hating the dead creature sitting on his knees before him. He hated everything, especially his own stupid need to conquer the boy, to possess him. It was dissatisfying to hurt a person who would even scream or cry as the lashes came down. To take such pain in absolute silence was beyond chilling. "I hate you." Kaiba hissed quietly, but the blonde gave no sign of having heard. He slapped the boy as hard as he could, sending Jounouchi skidding across the cold floor. The blonde promptly stood and returned to his former position at Kaiba's feet.  
  
"Oh Jounouchi." he whispered in horror.  
  
***  
  
He hated it how he was shuddering uncontrollably. Seto Kaiba showed no weakness, even when alone, this blantant act of fright was so wrong. He didn't know what else to do, what more he could do. The blond lay beside him in the limo as it sped through the midnight streets of Domino. Soon the shop loomed in front, the Kame Game Shop. He was desperate, uncertain, and it didn't suit him.  
  
He had lost control, everything had gone so wrong and it was frigtening. Jounouchi Katsuya had been almost completely destroyed by his game, and there was only one person who Kaiba knew could fix this, fix Jou. He bit the nails of one normal well manicured hand in frustration, staring at the darkened shop with impassive eyes. Turmoil spun turbulently beneath, but on the outside Kaiba was as calm as still waters.  
  
He wrapped Jounouchi in a blanket and opened the door of the limo quietly. He couldn't walk up to the shop, couldn't allow the game King to know what he had done to Yuugi's best friend, how Kaiba had managed to break the puppy. Kaiba had wanted him so badly, obsessed over the boy with the unruly blonde hair. He had wanted him and taken him. Kaiba had also managed to lose him, in a way more complete and hurtful than it was to simply stae at the boy at school without taking him and holding him. Kaiba knew his own particular brand of love was harmful and destructive, he didnt want and equal or a partner, he wanted a subservient, a person who lived to please him and that was all. He had gotten that and so much more than he had bargained for. An empty puppet who pleased him willingly, smiling even, but without a soul, without thought or feeling. Kaiba had tried to repair the blonde, to bring him back to himself, beat thought back into that thick skull. Large dark bruises and welts stood out starkly against Jou's too pale skin. Kaiba's own prefered methods certainly weren't going to help the boy, if anything if Kaiba tried harder he might just lose any chance of recovering Jou at all. He knew though that Yuugi Mutou would be the one to bring Jounouchi back if anyone could.  
  
He walked into the yard and placed Jou on the steps, wrapped tightly in the blanket. He turned swiftly and reentered the car, not saying a word. He sat silently on the drive home, cursing the world and himself. He also cursed Yuugi Mutou for having the ability to fix the one thing Kaiba wanted most, Jounouchi. If he let Yuugi fix the blonde he could never have him again. Kaiba sighed bitterly. He was brilliant, rich and had his whole life ahead of him, but the one thing he needed most would now be forever denied to him. He hated irony. He had possessed Jounouchi for a short while and because of it now had to give up his obsessed love for the blonde forever. Things were hardly ever fair.  
  
***  
  
His body was so tired, every part of him felt used, sensitive to the rough texture he was spread across. The wind was blowing harshly, he could feel it against his bare skin. His eyes were hazy and he tried once more to get to his feet. He moved slowly along the rough pavement on his hands and knees, searching something out, something he wasn't sure of. He felt the softness of grass in his next shuffle forward and moved onto it gratefully, resting momentarily against the sweetness of the morning grass. It was pleasantly wet with fresh dew and felt so blessedly cool against his hot skin. He closed his eyes to the morning light and found he couldn't open them again, he didn't want to. Moving was fruitless and pointless so he collapsed heavilly onto the ground, content to remain forever.  
  
He wasn't sure when or where but sounds began to nag him from all around, soft at first then growing louder and more frantic.  
  
---Oh god!!---  
  
--...at's happened to him, he's so hurt! He looks half dea...--  
  
More voices assaulted him from the white nothingness he was cocooned in.  
  
--Please, Jounouchi-kun! Say something, please say anythi....--  
  
--..gi, it looks like he's been beaten, he's suff....--  
  
--...pital, he needs treatment badly, I'll go make the ph...---  
  
He vaguely recognized the sounds but dismissed them as more lost memories, still fighting to come back and hurt him freshly. He wanted quiet, wanted to fade back into the whiteness where nothing touched him. He felt strong hands pick him up and he instictivly cringed as pain and memories stung his mind. He scream and thrashed, striking out violently at the one who had touched him. He hit the ground hard, still smelling the soft scents of morning before he lost consciousness completely.  
  
***  
  
He hurt, oh god how he hurt. A steady stream of tears wound painfully down his face, the salt stinging the cuts and scrapes on his cheeks. He sat hunched over and curled up tightly. Both hands were restrained and he sat sobbing into the wall. It was a safe room, he's heard them say that, safe. Jounouchi wailed, not recognizing the meaning of that word anymore. He thrashed violently and screamed for them to let him go, to unlock him from his prison, but the cries fell on deaf ears.  
  
He curled in further upon himself, trying to become small and invisible, longing to melt into the white floors and walls, to become no more than a part of his surroundings. He wanted out, oh god how he wanted out. They refused, no one would listen, not even Yuugi. He screamed for the small boy most nights, begging his friend to come and set him free. The boy never came, Jounouchi was left alone to howl impotently at the walls. Jou cried and howled and screamed his anger and fury and hatred, but it had been a mask. He didn't feel any of those things. He felt gone. He was lost within himself, to himself, and there wasn't any trail of bread crumbs to lead him back.  
  
The walls closed in around him so tightly, it was all so small and bright, so hard to breath. He gasped and panted between his hollering, but felt that he wasn't pulling air into his lungs. Everything was being sucked out of him, drained away in this terribly bright prison. His eyes stung and watered as the bright flourescents burned down on him, scaring him and making him wish for the darkness to save him. His skin itched and hurt, the dressing gown he wore pulling roughly across his shattered body, making his wounds break open again and bleed more of his blood onto the floor. People came regularily to clean up his blood, to change his soiled clothing and tell him everything would be fine. Damn bastards were liars, nothing was fine, there was no definition to such a word, it was no more than a false hope they extended him so that he might stop screaming at them. He refused to listen. None of them understood anything of what they said, how dumb and pointless their words were, how harmful.  
  
He twisted his hands roughly in their bonds, breaking open a deep cut against the inside of his wrist. He watched slowly as the blood began to pool and stain the white bandages a bright crimson. He stared dazzed at the rednes as it began to seep down his arm, his eyes hurt and transfixed. He was so confused, he didn't know what he was doing anymore, what was happing inside his head. He leaned back into the wall and glared up into the fierce lights which glared back at him, scorcing his sensitive eys.  
  
As nighttime descended a pristinely dressed orderly came into the room, a needle held delicately in one manicured hand. Jou froze, his eyes glazed over in terror, memories and flashbacks assaulting him fericiously. He called for help but no one came and steadily the orderly beared down on him. He shrieked and hurled himself back against the wall, his body snapping this way and that as he tried to avoid the inevitable. The pain was relitively small as the needle was inserted in his arm. He sobbed wretchedly as more orderlies entered the small space and carried him limply to the bed. He felt to weak and tired to resist their firm hands as they strapped him down for the night. The first orderly, a young woman looked down sadly at him adn pulled the covers over him, tucking them in securly at his sides. "Sleep well." she whispered quietly as she left the room, turning of the brightest of lights, leaving a lesser one on by the door so they could check on him during their rounds.  
  
Jou blinked as the haziness overcame him, pain and terror washing away in the sleepiness of the drugs. He tested his straps lightly, more out of habit than anything else, but they held fast of course. He spoke haltingly into the darkness at the shadows of the people that surrounded him, seeking out some reassurance, some kind of respite from the agony. His eyes closed slowly as he was blessedly carried away into the darkness of a dreamless sleep. "Kaiba......" he murmured softly before he was overtaken completely.  
  
***  
  
A/N: Jou's in a mental hospital, in case I didn't make that clear enough. Why? That gets revealed next chapter. There will be more Kaiba-the-bastard, Jou-the-tormented and other such stuff, plus flashbacks. Why? Flashbacks are fun! For those who might complain about my treatment of a mental facility, yeah, I'm putting forth the more made-for-TV-movie style version which isn't as common as you'd think. How do I know? I've been in a mental institution. It was actually a very nice place, had a gym and a pool and a great caf. I attended 4 weeks of classes and sessions to help me deal with my agoraphobia. (I havea fear of going outside. One of the hardest parts of the whole thing was getting TO the center, hour drive...not happy 'bout that!) For those who do have fears and problems that greatly affect how you live your life I suggest getting help, it's not shameful, it helped me alot. I'm not perfect, but I can go to the store by myself now. See ya! 


	4. Out of the White, Into the Red

If it comes out really weird please review telling me so. I keep having formatting problems. If it happens again I'd like to know so I can fix it asap.  
  
A/N: Yeah, I'm blatantly stealing/paraphrasing with this title, but oh well. This chapter is a bit (read as: A LOT) weirder than the ones before, but fairly pivotal in our little saga of Jounouchi-kun's tortured existance.  
  
PERSONALS: angelic nightmare: Yugi doesn't respond, 'cause he's part of Jou's delusion. he has lots of 'em. they make appearances in this chapter.  
  
Blue Loon Lagoon: lol, the 'give more chappies' dance always works!  
  
Ly the werewolf: Thanks! (I'm actually very grateful to everyone who didn't freak out 'cause I've been in a mental center. I was afraid to put it at first, but it felt like one of those old NBC commercials 'the more you know' where stars would give little inspirational messages' I felt I should.) As for Fierce Child. Chapter 12 was reposted and completed, and now I'm finishing the epilogue. Chapter 1 of Fierce Heart is already to go as soon I finish the little epilogue.  
  
THANKS TO EVERYONE ELSE WHO REVIEWED ME!!!!  
Master: Out of the White, Into the Red.  
  
***  
  
PLEASE.......  
  
***  
  
"God, you really don't get this do you? I've been standing here wasting our time for over three hours now and you're as dense as ever." the boy shook his head in frustration. His long coat wisped quietly around his legs.  
  
Jounouchi curled his knees to his chest and lughed lightly, carefully hiding his tear filled eyes from the person standing casually across the room from him. He was tied down to his hospital bed by thick straps that encircled his wrists. Besides the fact the straps were padded he had the extra protection of the bandages wrapping most of his forearms. He chuckled again. Sure, they were good. The hospital people, he explained mentally to himself, very good. After he had spent hours scratching and tearing at his arms with his fingernails they'd placed his hands into these special bags that reminded him of overmitts. Of course he still had perfectly good teeth.  
  
//Please, just for a bit, let me up for a bit. I'll be good, oh so good. You just have to let me show you! I can, really. I promise. I can be good. I'm so good. I'll do whatever you say....what--whatever you....want. I can, I can do it,....I will.....so sorry.......I'm good.....//  
  
Now he spent most of his time strapped into bed. He could still bring his legs up to his chest, but try as he might he couldn't reach any part of himself with the intent to hurt. He wasn't sure why he was so concerned with hurting himself, but it brought a certain dull relief that nothing else in the small white room provided him with. The pain sung, it pulled him away from himself into another place entirely, a place where things weren't so damnably white.  
  
***  
  
MASTER  
  
***  
  
The other person in the room leaned heavily against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest. He huffed quietly and rolled his eyes. He had been keeping Jou company for the past few days, although Jou wasn't sure just how helpful this apparition was. Still, Jou desperately needed this company, needed to make things alright, to live up to expectations.  
  
"Oh come on! Just fucking get well already!" the darker boy yelled to the boy tied to his bed. Jou laughed. Though annoying, his other was extremely entertaining. He was so serious, a scowl pasted perpetually across his lean face.  
  
//Well....I'm well, aren't I?// he laughed more.//I'd know if I weren't well, wouldn't I? Wouldn't I? I'd know, I'm sure I'd//  
  
A firm hand slapped him across the face. Jou blinked in confusion, staring up with dull eyes. A nurse and two orderlies stoof over him, each wearing identical worried expressions. Soon a doctor came rushing in, adusting the glasses on his round face. "What happened?" he demanded shortly, noticing the red mark marring the pale skin of Jou's cheek.  
  
The nurse backed away, her eyes downcast. "I-I'm sorry! I just couldn't, I didn't know what to do anymore!! He was screaming again, it was so loud...." she trailed off apologetically, her hands twisting the fabric of her apron.  
  
The doctor sighed and smiled lightly. "I'm sorry, I know this is hard, you haven't been on the job long. I'd like to move you to another patient, build your experience a little more slowly. This is a very trying case, I can understand your frustration."  
  
***  
  
Where....master? Master?  
  
***  
  
The dark boy frowned and stared hatefully at the administrators. He could understand the frustration too, but he hadn't gone running for the hills yet. Jou giggled. Perhaps the other couldn't. While Jou studied his companion intently the doctors talked quietly amongst themselves.  
  
The dark hair boy stared at him, those eyes, just starign. It was tearing apart his soul. His mind reached eagerly towards the feeling, his heart sinking deeper into his chest. His body ached and his skin prickled, conflicting sensations worming through his tired body. He blinked back tears.  
  
//It hurts, it hurts. Oh gods... those eyes. My heart...it's so...PLEASE!!! Oh god, I don't want to, no hurt, oh, please. HELP! why won't you? No...just help me..........please.....? help........//  
  
He screamed into the whiteness of the ceiling, trying to bring down the attention of the other ones who watched out for him, but no one was coming. The hospital staff all turned and tried to comfort him, or contain him, but he didn't need them at the moment. He thrashed wildly as the darkness was coming down over the room, the coldness seeping into his body. He could feel the bright crimson of his blood pumping fast through his head, could feel the emptiness welling up inside him as he screamed for salvation, but still nothing. He bit savagely at a hand that tried to come across his chest and hold him down, he snarled as though a dog gone feral. Eyes stared at him from within the darkness enveloping him, cold blue eyes that froze him, turned him into ice even as he still struggled. Pain bit into his arm and the darkness retracted suddenly, a new nothingness replacing it from the inside. The last thing he remembered were the mirthless eyes of his darker half looking down into his own with lightly veiled amusement.  
  
***  
  
To sleep, perchance to dream? If I wake will you still be with me?  
  
***  
  
It was nighttime when he woke up next, but he wasn't alone. The dark boy was sitting at the end of the bed, slender hands clutching at the blankets, twisting the soft fabric this way and that, his face deep in introspective contemplation. His eyes were cold and hard as always. Besides the slight movements of those beautiful hands no other trace could be seen to tell if the other boy was even alive. Jou wondered biefly if he wasn't breathing.  
  
//Could he do that? He has to breath...he's here right? He's not just playing games? He loves games, I can play if that's want he wants. Whatever he wants....he doesn't want to breath than it's alright. I hope he doesn't mind if I breath, I have to I think....unless he says....//  
  
"So..." Jou coughed softly, his voice cracked and horse. He licked his lip to try and gget some moisture back into his mouth.  
  
The dark boy looked up briefly and shrugged. For some reason the gesture bothered Jou, it was painful to watch the seeming uncaring of this other individual. The boy stood abruptly and walked to the door, the one portal out of this white hell. "Dinner comes soon, you know that?" the brunette said suddenly, his soft voice conveying whole different levels of meaning.  
  
Jou nodded. Despite his bouts of unconsciousness his internal clock was preternaturally aware. He was never sure what day it was, or what month even, but he could tell the time with near-precision whenever asked. It made little sense, but whatever could not be explain, Jou accepted that it was the will of those who watched him. It made him smile.  
  
//They're there....still...watching...right? Right? Master....watch me.//  
  
"You need to watch, to listen carefully. Everything she does, everything she says." the other whispered quietly, his voice deep and strangely intent. "We don't want to be here forever, do we?" The words eerily echoed his thoughts, to watch, to listen.  
  
Jou looked back blankly, uncomprehending. Of course he didn't want to stay like this, tied to a bed in a padded cell, he was still conscious enough of himself to know that much. He didn't understand what the other spirit was asking him to do, what it was trying to tell him.  
  
The door swung open, swishing through the other spirit in a disturbing manner. The dark boy simply walked back through the door and emerged on the other side, his movements mimicking that of the nurse. She smiled pleasantly at him and brought in a rolling tray that held his dinner. She was new. Jou had a hard time recognizing people lately, but he knew he hadn't seen this young girl before. She pulled the tray across the bed and began to set out the utensils and his juicebox. She lifted the top from the tray and the bland familiar smell of hospital food assaulted Jou's nose. No, he definitly didn't want to stay here forever  
  
***  
  
I'm coming, oh gods it hurts....but I'm coming. Wait for me, WAIT!!!  
  
***  
  
The girl smiled cheerily and straightened his bed covers. "Hi, I'm Jun. It's nice to meet you Jounouchi-kun." it vaguely bothered Jou that the girl would adress him with any degree of familiarity. He didn't know her and didn't want to. He stared back passivly at her, not responding. Her brow creased slightly for a moment, but then it was replaced again by a grin, but more tight and forced now on her thin face. She absently swept back her long red hair into a ponytail and grabbed the fork from the tray. "What would you like first?"  
  
Jou let out a string of sulfurous curses before shuting up and keeping his mouth firmly closed. This time it was the other boy's turn to chuckle. Jounouchi struggled slightly and fitfully turned himself as far from the girl and the tray as possible given the fact he was restrained and could really only go so far. He wanted nothing to do with this girl, this food or this hospital, and he meant to show that clearly. He heard the girl huff rather loudly, then she grabbed him by the chin and tried to forcibly turned him back towards her. Jou thought it was pretty laughable that the slip of a girl thought she could move him. A forkful of turnip mush was shovelled into his mouth. He wondered vaguely how Jun had managed that.  
  
"She's pushy." the dak boy growled from his position against the wall behind the candystripper. He had one knee cocked up slightly and was bent over with his elbow on his outstretched knee supporting his head, it looked both awkward and comfortable. It was also the only way to watch Jou without coming closer. His friend almost always prefered to stick by the walls when they weren't alone. Perhaps being walked-through was as disturbing to feel as it was to watch.  
  
Jou nodded his agreement and feeling particularily beligerent, he spit the disgusting food back out. Jun growled lightly, much to Jounouchi's satisfaction. She bent over the side and got down on her hands and knees and began to clean up the mess he'd made. Jou's eyes glittered darkly, the tray was so close.  
  
//...so slow...so careful....just reach a bit. Help me, why the hell won't you help me????? If I can just , please, make it, please. I can make it, make it for you. TO you. Come for me, you haven't.....I have to....try...why?? What am I doing...but....please.//  
  
He bucked his knees up suddenly, jamming them into the underside of the tray as hard as he could manage. He twisted slightly as he did it, sending the metallic cart sprawling onto the floor, the food spilling out across the bare tiles. The candystripper glard bitterly at him, a ugly grimace on her plain face. She walked slowly from the room to the cleaning cart sitting right outside, she was muttering angrily.  
  
***  
  
So close. Close.  
  
***  
  
It made ripping noises, such sweet ripping noises. He teared fast, eager and excited. It felt so good! The sawing motion was frantic and unsteady, but at such a pace. His hand deftly snaked out of the half torn bond to undo the hurtful strap that still tied him to the bed. He smirked and looked around, he was still unsteady from drugs and having been tied down for days, but he was UP.  
  
//Coming.//  
  
It was so sweet, the faint buzzing sound of the tearing, soft and ragged as he tore. The sensations rippled up his hands and thrummed passionately throughout his body, sparking every nerve into blessed wakefulness. He heard he sharp intake of breath, last breath.  
  
//Only breath if he says so......//  
  
He had never realized how beautiful the colour was, how bright it was as he painted the whiteness over with beautiful crimson. She scowled, even as her eyes melted, light pooling and draining into some unfathomable depth below her. Jou didn't know where the light was headed but he hoped it was somewhere red.  
  
//COMING!!!//  
  
The keys jingled so pleasantly, the metal so refreshingly cool against his dry skin. He giggled slightly as the dark one followed him. One by one the voices came and found their bodies, so many eyes watching him, waiting in anticipation. The corridor was small and of course, it was white. He wanted to escape this white universe and for a moment he looked longingly back into the redness he'd painted.  
  
//so sweet....copper....the smell the taste....it's copper and it's life and it's everything. It's his, all his and so am I, I belong. The life, my life it is all inside and it BELONGS!!!//  
  
He had to move forward, find another place to go, another colour to be. The keys tinkled joyously in his sweaty hands as he moved towars the first window. He could see the eyes above him, staring down hatefully, trying to burn and destroy him, trying to bar his way. He snarled visciously and hurled himself at the window, jerking frantically at the rusted grating. It gave way beneath his frenzied attacks, screechingly pulled from it's frame, hurling them both backwards. The ones watching him laughed, mocked him and he growled. The dark one look into his soul questioningly. "Where will you go?" it asked softly, voice so harsh and so lovely. He wanted that voice, wanted to drown in it.  
  
//Co....coming....c-com..ing....//  
  
He wanted to embrace the figure, to strangle it and a million other things at once. He wanted to run from it, to it, be it. So many desires, it engulfed him, devoured him completely and the thoughts took him into their blissful redness. The knife bit deeply into his arm as he stared and watched the red drip down along the blade and puddle onto the floor by his feet.  
  
***  
  
WHERE?? PLEASE WHERE???????  
  
***  
  
After a moment Jounouchi smiled. He knew, he had a plan. For the first time in his life Jounouchi Katsuya had already thought ahead. The dark one and all the others had helped him, taught him this. He pulled in the feelings and thoughts of his others, those who now surrounded him and tucked them deeply into his heart, the thoughts and needs ready to serve and wake when they were needed.  
  
//Need...whatever you need.....what...what do I need....??//  
  
He snickered deeply as he crashed out the glass from the window. He was ready, he could go now, be free. There was still so much to do, so much that remained to be completed before he could rest in that final red place. He closed his eyes, tears mixing with the rain. He howled voicelessly as he jumped into the freshness of the green world and sprinted into the black night.  
  
Inside the darkness coiled and churned, mixing through and around the red, intertwining. There was so much to do, so much he needed. One thing must come first though, before all. He needed to be free, to lose everything before he could be born again. That meant he must sever the strings that dug inside his flesh, binding his heart. Only then could he go to the rednss that awaited as his destiny.  
  
//YOU. THERE IS ONLY YOU. MY NEED. NEED//  
  
His eyes flashed darkly in the pale moonlight as he streaked unseen and unheard through the dead sleeping world that filled the blackness. He left to seek out the red.  
  
*** MASTER!!  
  
*********************** A/N: Jou's deeply insane by now. I'm sure you've noticed that. He's a bit more lucid in the next chapter. I hope you guys will actually stay tuned. 


	5. The First Shade: Crimson

Thanks to all my reviewers so far, I'm glad some people actually like this stuff I come up with.  
  
A/N: Oh dear god, what am I doing now....I just seem to keep gaining levels of deprevation....poor Jou, he's never gonna forgive me for this.....  
  
Chapter 5: The Fist Shade: Crimson  
  
***  
  
Leather....  
  
He looked intently at his darkened reflection, staring back into himself with bright eyes. He decided he looked pretty good in the black skin hugging material. He ran his hands over his body experimentally, liking the feeling of the slick clothes that clung to him. Jou wondered absently why he'd never tried leather before, it seemed to look awfully nice on him, his body dark and well defined, his hair set apart and nearly glowing. He looked damn good, and smiled from the knowledge. He looked better than Yugi did in leather.  
  
He spun a few times to examine himself at every angle before he picked up his bag and walked from the apartment. Despite the obviously broken lock, he closed the door behind himself and walked casually down the hall. It had only taken seven apartments to find something suitable to fit him and make him look good. He had hoped it wouldn't have taken him so long, but even a juvenile delinquent like himself had to rely on luck. Unfortunately it seemed missing at first, but in the end since no one had caught him he decided luck had done him just fine. He stuffed the hospital gown absently into the bag he'd stolen from the second apartment he'd been exploring in. Of course, he was several streets and several buildings away from that lace now. He certainly wasn't dumb enough to loot in only one building. Thankfully, Japan had an awful lot of apartment buildings, and he knew from living in the seedy side of town which ones didn't have proper security devices.  
  
//And Dad said I'd never amount to anything....// Jounouchi thought passively as he threw a coat on over the leather. It was still cold enough to need a jacket and the leather hadn't yet absorbed his body warmth. He looked through his bag and played absently with some of the costume jewelery he'd found laying around in various homes. It was all chepy stuff to be sure, you didn't live in a place like this and spend money on gaudy stuff like the necklaces he'd taken. It didn't matter though, he just needed a few pieces to accent his new leather outfit. He grinned. Damn, he knew he looked fine, and he knew he would be appealing to his master.  
  
Jou paused and looked up thoughtfully towards the moon, it was bright and full now and cast a beautiful silver light over everything. He wondered if anyone knew he was missing, if the doctos had told Yugi and his friends, or maybe his father. He shivered, preferring it if his dad stayed drunk and clueless. Chances were that his dad was in fact passed out somewhere, probably with a bottle of whiskey and a cheap hooker. Jou sighed. It didn't matter much. He played with the zipper of his coat and considered going to Yugi, some deeper part of himself felt that maybe that was where he should be going, rather than back to Kai-master. He shook his head roughly, upset for almost having said his master's name. A small voice spoke in whispers telling him he had to say 'Master', he must obey and now that he was free he needed to return. Of course, another voice piped up that his master had abadoned him in the first place, he should be mad. A voice he'd carried with him since childhood said it was crazy to be having such an in depth conversation with yourself and he should just get a move on to wherever the hell he was going. Considering he had left, well escaped really, the hospital, he didn't want to be crazy. Sure, it wasn't that easy, like turning off a switch, but talking to yourself was a bad sign.  
  
//Why can't my mind just shut the hell up.....I just need to know where I'm going....// Jou started walking forwards again, his strides taking him through a lush park. He leaned against a tree and slid to the ground carefully, then folded up his legs beneath him. //Where am I supposed to go??// he thought dismally, not realizing that his eyes had begun to well up with tears again. He felt so lost and abandoned. His heart was telling him to seek out Yugi, but his fear told him to go back to his master. He was hurt and heartbroken and dark inside. Jounouchi knew his life had never been exactly cheery, though he'd done a good job hiding it, but he'd never felt worse.  
  
//Why did no one come for me?// The thought was quiet and spoke of great hurt that stabbed in his mind. Not one person had asked to come see him other than his mother and sister. He'd sent Shizuka fleeing with tears in her eyes, though it was hazy and he didn't remember why she ran. His mother had just looked down blankly at him. //She looked at me like there was no hope...I'm not hopeless, am I? Is that why no one.....no! I'm not gonna think like that!//  
  
Still, the fact remained that no friends had come, and neither had his master. Why would he, he'd already abadoned Jou once. What had he done so wrong that he was thrown out? Jounouchi couldn't remember, the last few months were a blur lost to the drugs and the timelessness that existed inside the hospital. He could always go to Shizuka, but he couldn't. He knew he wasn't better yet and the idea of causing her more pain wasn't worth the risk. Nope, he'd have to figure it out for himself, where he should go.  
  
There was a vague idea in his head that if he went back to his master things might be better, they might change. A dark void swarmed below that thought, angry and unbidden. It was stupid to think things would just magically get better, they didn't. If you wanted things to change you made them. A smile touched Jou's face, a dark light shone from deep in his eyes. You made things better.  
  
He got up and began to run, the park whooshed by in a torrent of greeness. Slowly the leather began to lose it's stiffness and it felt nice and snug on him as he ran for all he was worth. He picked up speed as he went further from the place he'd began, his body moving gracefully through the midnight streets. He thought it was midnight, but probably a bit earlier since so many people still were out for the evening. Since escaping his cronometer had gone to shit, he was lucky if he could tell the time and be within 5 hours. Not that it mattered, he could pick up a clock now that he was out. It occured to him absently that he could've taken a watch while he was snooping in other people's apartments. Of course, he probably couldn't have found a nice watch to match his outfit.  
  
A block away from the Kaiba Corp building he ducked into another park and jogged over the the fountain that stood at it's center. It was nice and quiet in the business district of Domino, most men having gone back to their families by now, but he was sure Master would still be at work. The park was destered and he was grateful for the time alone. His stomach fluttered nervously as he removed the jacket and let it fall around his feet. He perched on the fountain ledge and leaned over to look himself over once more in the water's mirrored surface.  
  
The leather still clung to his body with intimate tightness that was just a hair's width away from being uncomfortable. The pants came to his waist and were topped with a fancy silver-linked belt that stood out nicely. The top was a vest that left his arms bare and showed of a good deal of his chest. He smiled again at his appearance. For someone who'd spent the last months tied to his bed he still was in good shape. He thanked kami-sama silently, glad that he'd look so good for his Master. He fished in the bag and added a few silver bracelets and a stylized armband that looked like a branch wrapping around his bicep. He brushed his hair back from his eyes and looked intently for several moments, just studying himself, his looks and movements. Nothing seemed wrong or different, which was good, his master hated change and the unexpected. //Maybe that's why he abandoned me....everything became too much of a surprise for him to deal with.// then again, his master was supposed to be able to deal with anything.  
  
Jou sighed, not wanting to get in another mental argument with himself. Nope, he wasn't going to act crazy tonight, or so he hoped. He still wasn't sure if he looked crazy from the outside looking in, but there wasn't much to be done for that. He wrapped himself in a aura of confidence, a trick he'd learned long ago while surviving gang life. If you could make them belive you were tough, that you knew you would win, they'd usually back down. People were like that. Jou knew the confidence was a bluff, his best friends likely did too, but most of the outwards world didn't see past the facade that covered his failings. His hands darted back up to his hair unconsciously, fussing with it and then smoothing it out again. He knew how much Master loved his golden locks. He'd snuck into an older building early in his investigations that night and hadn't taken anything but a shower. Oh...and the towels. He wasn't dumb enough to leave those behind, the stuff they did with DNA now. Of course his hair was probably in the drain now too, so they could take that, but would anyone go to the trouble with nothing but a set of faded grey towels being stolen? He laughed. By going back with his master he was sure that he'd be provided with a good lawyer and get off no matter what. It paid to be rich and have a reputation for ruthlessness. If charges came up they'd be dropped, a certain someone wuld be seeing to it.  
  
Jou tilted his head back and his eyes traced up the building slowly, seeking out the uppermost levels. It was cloudless and clear and Jounouchi was fairly certain he could see lights on somewhere near the top, where the executive offices were. He ran his hands along the leather and took a deep breath, steeling himself for what came next.  
  
//Huh??......Shit. What comes next??// Jou opened the doors and walked into the lobby. It was decortated in red and was fairly lavish. A large semi- circle desk of dark stained oak took up the space between the front elevators. Instead of a secretary a guard sat behind the glowing wood, he was staring hard in Jou's direction. //I doubt many leather-clad young guys come in here late at night....unless you count Master and maybe Yugi...I think he's been here before.// Jou strode up to the man and stared back into his eyes.  
  
"May I help you?" the guy asked gruffy from somewhere beneath a furry grey beard.  
  
Jou smiled and turned on the charm. "Hey, yeah, I just need to scoot up and talk to Ma.....Uh, Kaiba Seto." Jou blinked and hesitated. He couldn't call his Master by name, but if he'd said 'Master' he'd probably get thrown out on his ass. Hopefully he'd be forgiven just this once.  
  
The man looked up at Jou with flat uncurious eyes. "Kaiba-sama sees no one this late. Call tomorrow and make an appointment."  
  
Jou beamed "So he is here!" sure, it had been in all likelihood, but confirmation was always nice. "Just buzz up to him and tell him he has a visitor."  
  
The man looked at him doubtfully, but Jou smiled as brightly as he could, trying to be his winning best. It seemed to work. Or hell, maybe the guy just had a thing for teenage boys in leather. Considering who his boss was, who knew? The man looked down and pressed a button on an intercom, then held down the speak panel. "Kaiba-sama, a visitor is here--"  
  
A harsh voice cut the man off suddenly, a very angry voice. "You know you aren't supposed to bother me when I'm working, you do like your job don't you?"  
  
Jou leaned over the counter and put his face close to the speaker. "I'm sorry...I just wanted to leave you a message....your lost puppy found it's way home.  
  
A beat passed breathlessly then a quiet voice came from the intercom. "Send him up."  
  
Jou smiled and headed towards the back elevator, the only one that led directly from the lobby to the executive suite and vice-versa. It opened immediately and he stepped inside. As soon as he was moving his breath exploded outwards in relief and his legs gave way. Most of the ride was a blur as he sat in a puddle on the floor trying to glue himself back together from his bout of nerves. He felt heady and the world was spinning around him. It made his mind sing with pain and frustration. He was going to be sick, he was certain of it, but nothing happened. Of course, if he did he'd just find a bathroom and clean himself up. Nothing on the face of the world would keep him from his Master after so long. Choked laughed worked it's way up his throat until he was sobbing and laughing in the grips of absolute hysteria.  
  
//Why....why am I doing this??// his mind screamed silently, trying to pull back from the brink of his madness. //I don't want to be here...I don't want to hurt....// he gripped his head with both hands, his body trembling. //Oh god...Yugi....what the hell am I doing? I should've gone to Yugi...but I can't, I have too//  
  
The elevator stopped, startling Jounouchi from his thoughts, his mind going eerily quiet. The doors opened slowly to face a broad door, oak like the desk downstairs. A gold name plate stood out from the burnished wood, but Jou kept his face turned from it, not wanting to read it, not wanting to realize where he was and what he was about to do. His stomach rumbled in nervous apprehension and another voice in his mind tried frantically to whisper that it wasn't to late, that he could still close the door adn go back to the lobby. He could run from the building and back through the streets. Even with his eyes closed he knew he could find the Kame Game Shop.  
  
His body stood and moved forward of it's own volition, ignoring the frantic pleas screaming for release inside his tired mind. He felt so tired, so dead, and what lay behind the door was the only cure, his only salvation. What ever was behind the door would either save his sanity or send him wailing over the edge. Jounouchi wasn't sure which possibility he should be praying for, it didn't matter so long as he never would up back in that hospital. So white and barren and dead. He hated it and vowed not to go back, he had to go forward.  
  
He hands reached out hesitantly and clamped tightly over the gold handles, cool and pleasant in his heated grip. His shoulders working slowly, he pulled the doors open so that a foot of light appeared between them.  
  
Master's fingers were drumming lightly on his desk, Jou wasn't sure if it was nervousness or anticipation. Cold blue eyes settled onhis face and Jou opened the doors enough to slip inside. He stood tensly in the deep shadows of the office, not ready to step forward into the full effect of the chilled gaze of his Master.  
  
The brunette stood up quickly and stepped with long graceful movements around the corner of his desk. The room was sparcly decorated, which reflected Master's minimalist frame of mind. The less distractions there were the easier it was to work. Jou shuffled his feet, feeling very much like a distraction. //I shouldn't have come here and bothered him, he's not going to like it...//  
  
A soft hand cupping his face brough his eyes up suddenly and he found himself staring dazedly into the cerulean depths of his Master's gaze. Jou swallowed dryly and stood still, too shocked to move. The hand patted his cheek in a gentle manner while the other hand busied itself with his chest. The skin felt so cool and welcome against his own, it was inviting in ways that made Jou scream inside.  
  
The taller boy pulled the blonde in close to him, their lips almost touching. "You came back." his voice breathed light and airy, a sound that blended into the silence and was gone as soon as said. The lips claimed Jou's mouth and worked warmly against him, tongue pushing in lightly to take entrance. Jou opened his mouth obediantly and allowed himself to be kissed, but not kiss back. He didn't know the terms of what was taking place, of what must pas between them now, and he was afraid of what might happen if he overstepped the boundaries. The brunette seemed unworried as his tongue explored Jou's mouth, relishing in the taste and scent of the slight blonde. He tugged at the zipper of the vest that sheathed Jounouchi's torso, his hands desperate to explore the boy's flesh, the flesh which he thought forever denied to him. His puppy had come back though.  
  
Kaiba broke the kiss and stared intently into the chocolate eyes of his would-be lover. The depth spoke of pain and hatred, but love as well. Most of all Kaiba knew that the person staring back out at him was indeed Jounouchi Katsuya. A miracle, his miracle. He leaned back in to possess the other boy again. Pleasure flowed over him in waves as he deepened the kiss, his hands now eagerly seeking out the belt buckle so that the pants could join the vest on the floor. Thoughts of torture and dominace were temporarily forgotten, Kaiba simply wanted Junouchi, in any and all ways possible at this given moment. The blonde wasn't putting up a fight.  
  
Jou began to kiss back timidly at first, but with increasign passion, his tongue fighting with Kaiba's for dominace over their locked mouths. Hands struggled with clothing as it was removed and tossed to the floor. Jou wrapped one arm about his Master's waist and one hand went to cup his neck. Kaiba began to kiss tenderly along Jou's jaw, enjoying the flavour of his skin. Jou smiled as the sensations pssed breifly through his mind, only to be swallowed up by the turmoil inside. Kaiba gasped as the hand tightened around his neck, two hands now, becoming rough and grasping. He tried to suck air into his lungs but his throat burned and he pulled nothing in. He struggled against the hands that held him, but Jou seemed overcome by a preternatural strength as he throttled the life out of his Master. Energy seemed to sap from his limb as he tried to tear free, but it was useless. He wasn't sure how jou had accomplished it, but he was stronger this once than Kaiba was. Damn.  
  
Jounouchi Katsuya was looking down at him through dark eyes, a grim light shining from somewhere deep inside. Staring into those ruined eyes was the last thing Kaiba remembered before he passed out.  
  
When he woke up he realized with dull certainly that he was tied to his chair. Damn again. Jou sat on his desk in front of him, his head resting on his curled up knees. "You're not even gonna struggle?" the blonde asked softly. Kaiba growled lowly in responce, not realizing how ironic the behaviour was, given their roles only a few weeks ago. Jou shrugged. It bothered Kaiba, the seeming uncaring of his now would-be Master. His stomach dropped and he became coldly certain that he had hit on what was happening. The voice of his adoptive father spoke sharply inside his head, telling him no Kaiba could ever be conquered or destroyed. The irony of that was Seto had done just that very thing to the old man. Of course, Kaiba Seto was a much different person from Kaiba Gozaburo.  
  
Jou eyed him without curiousity, remembering from weeks now distant the shape and grace of his master's naked flesh. It wasn't particularily fascinating to him, Jou felt no stimulation at the sight like he had though he would. Something was missing, he mused absently, his hands twirling through his hair. He stood and slunk to his captive in a daze and knelt before him, staring up with bemused eyes. "I know what you'd like Master, what will make you feel better. He deftly dipped his head into the brunette's lap and nipped playfully at his manhood. Jou could feel the heat building in the other boy's skin at the practiced bites he placed lovingly along the shaft as his master twitched and tried not to groan beneath him. Jou looked back up grinning at the sight of his master with his eyes clamped closed, biting his lip to keep from crying out. Master seemed to be enjoying his ministrations but was determined to make no sound, to show no sign of it. Jou knew even his Master's willpower would melt under his ouch as he took the erect member into his mouth and ran his tongue along the tip. Kaiba squirmed from the feeling of the warmth around him, but couldn't pull away, didn't want to. Jou sucked and nipped playfully with him as he began to openly moan and push back against Jou in pleasure. The boy let his gaze drift upwards until he caught the troubled blue gaze. His master was watching him carefully, anger and desire a strange mix in his eyes. Jou bit down hard and watched as His master tried to pull back, eyes closed again in pain. The blonde pulled back suddenly and grabbed for the bag the sat beside the chair, Kaiba hadn't noticed it sitting there admidst all the distractions. Jou grinned as he pulled a few toys from the backpack. Kaiba notived now in shock that one of the toys was a miniture cat-o-nine-tails. A whip. Not good.  
  
Jou found what he was looking for and kissed his master on the inside of the thigh, working slowly up towards the source of Kaiba's need. Jou grinned as he teased and prodded his master towards climax, he could feel it coming in the deep moans coming from his throat, and in the urgent rocking of his hips. He placed the piece of plastic down over the tip of Kaiba's erection and rolled it down painfull to sit at his base. Kaiba quivered with the need of his release that Jou denied him, but the blonde looked on placidly. He wanted his release before he'd permit Kaiba to have his. Jou smirked darkly, his eyes veiled and deep. He stood sloly and then came forward to straddle his master's lap, trapping his member between them. Kaiba gasped and moaned as Jou watched in amusement.  
  
"Soon enough..." Jou murmured softly as he kissed Kaiba's collar bone lightly, leaving a wet trail along the width of his chest. the blonde looked up and smiled, claiming his master's lips. "I'll let you have your fun when I'm done. " Not able to do much more, Kaiba tried to spit at him. Jou laughed since it didn't work, his master's mouth was far too dry by now, with all that moaning and such he'd seemed to have so much fun doing a few moments before.  
  
Jou pulled the pocket knife slowly from the bag and stared at it. transfixed, as he pulled the knife from it's sheath. The metal was bright and cool and stood out beautifully against the soft skin of his master. He felt his master wince and jerk back as the knife dug into the creamy flesh above his left nipple. Jou took it into his mouth, sucking at it tenderly, enjoying the taste of Kaiba's flesh and blood pouring into his mouth. Excitement began to well up inside him as he drank down his master's lifeblood, the warm coppery liquid filling him. It felt nice. Kaiba was making a strange hissing sound like some kind of snake, which made Jou almost want to laugh, almsot want to pull away, but he stayed fixed where he was. The knife dug in again near the CEO's collar bone, a red line trailing down the front of his chest as the blonde sitting across his lap began to lick and nip at the wound. Kaiba could feel Jou's excitement against him as the boy kissed his chest and coverd it with more of his blood.  
  
Jou slashed in fervour at the soft skin that lay like a blank canvass in front of him, the bright redness such a welcome sight against the pale flesh. He kissed and licked frantically at Kaiba as he worked, taking in the feel and scent of his wounded master with every second. Red streaks and swirls marred the perfection of Kaiba's chest as Jou rocked against him, his release coming sudden and warm against his master. Jou sat still and huddled against his master for a second before slipping down backward of the lap and looking up with bright dazed eyes. Jounouchi Katsuya looked more lost and hurt than Kaiba could imagine any living person to feel. Numb hands felt clumbsily for his member and removed the ring that bound him and his release. Jou took it again into his mouth and ran his tongue gently along the underside, feeding and nuturing his master's coming orgasm. Kaiba drooped forward as it happened, the last of his energy running out with it and he blacked out in a wave of pleasure and pain.  
  
Jou looked with frightened eyes at the mess he had made, the horrible redness that stained the white perfection of his master. It was inexcusable his mind whimpered as he tried in desperate hurried movements to wipe the rdness from Kaiba with the towel that was now on the floor. Slowly most began to come off, but the largest cut still bled a deep crimson that flowed slowly down his chest and pooled in his lap, now staining his member in the same redness. Jou backed up until he bumped into the large desk and he fell, gripping at the sides of his head and sobbing into his knees. He curled in upon himself and lay that way for hours as the dawn swiftly came.  
  
His master still lay unconscious in the chair, his head fallen forward onto his chest. The blood had stopped and clotted a few hours before and had darkened and begun to flake on the pale skin. Jou cried and looked outside at the lightening sky, not wanted to face tomorrow, not wanting to know what would come next. He hurt all over and inside. His body felt as though he'd been taken again, but he knew it was guilt, his body trying to punish him for his crimes.  
  
//What did I do?? Oh kami-sama....what the hell is wrong with me? I don't want to be like this....// wounded inside and out he crawled forlornly over to his master and held on to his leg like a child as he fell into a dark disturbed sleep where the shadows from below came up to claim and possess him, dragging him downwards into hell.  
  
He noticed with grim finality that hell was red.  
  
****  
  
A/N: Kaiba's not dead, just hurt. Then again so is Jou. I'm so evil, I actually had him getting a rise out of cutting Kaiba. It's this whole pain=sex thing that Kaiba taught him. (Kaiba got turned on by whipping Jou, well, Jou prefers cutting. Just a matter of personal taste.) (Oh and yes, that's the reason Jou didn't get -ahem- excited, until after he began cutting Kaiba, the whole pain is necessary factor.)  
  
Once again, none of Jou's friends show up in this chapter. What are they doing, don't they care about Jounouchi-kun? Well of course they do! What the hell are they supposed to do? All they know is Jou disappeared for a couple of weeks, turned up raped, tortured and not himself, then due to trauma and self-harm problems he got put into a metal hospital (for his own safety). There isn't much they can so, they aren't a junior detective squad. There's only so much they can do. As for them going to 'likely suspects' (one reviewer e-mailed me about having the gang tag Kaiba as a likely suspect) the gang probably wouldn't think of Kaiba, they don't think he's enough of a prick to rape Jou, he doesn't even like Jounouchi after all. (little do they know) the most likely suspects would probably be associated with jou's former life in a gang, a since even Honda doesn't know all the details, where would they begin? Yugi-tachi will likely show up before the end, but nope, so far they're pretty clueles about what's going on. Not that it's their fault, what are they supposed to do besides being filled with impotent fury and sadness? (I just wrote all this so everybody doesn't have to go 'but where are Yugi and the others, why aren't they helping Jou!?!?!)  
  
See ya!! 


	6. Away

A/N: Well, this chapter went strange...I wrote it in normal 3rd person style, but it seemed to be too jumpy, so instead I put it into 1st person. Jou's having a mind trip right about now. It's somewhat different since we're following Jou's perceptions and his mind isn't exactly right at the moment....I think it's kinda fun though....lets me use a lot of '.....', which I love to do! This chapter isn't put completely into any mode, past, present or future, it just came out pretty quick from my mind to the screen. I tried to make the tense a bit under focused, because it suits Jounouchi-kun at the moment. There also isn't much dialogue, 'cause Jou just isn't paying much attention to such things. I know it's weird, but I hope you're able to follow it easily enough....oh there's a lot more swearing in this chapter, not anything terribly bad or any worse than you'd hear on primetime television....mostly just 'damn' and 'hell', 'cause they're great to use to make things more emphatic.  
  
Oh, one other thing....I now have a poem dedicated to this story...it's wonderfully dark and disturbing, much like this fic. Please go check out 'Dark Poetry' by Mistress of Dragons. It's really good, and it makes a great accompaniment to this story....well, last chapter at least....this chapter isn't really dark. It's a necessary step though...more darkness will come, after all, no matter how many times the sun rises, you just know the night is going to come back and swallow it again. (go darkness!!)  
*****  
  
I'm running but I'm not really going anywhere. You know how that feels? It's like the whole world is just rushing past me and I ain't moving. It's confusing, and dizzy. If I thought it was safe I might just lay down and take a nap, but it's dangerous. The shadows are waiting out in that blurry landscape, if I stop they're gonna find me again....I don't wanna let that happen. Not pleasant.  
  
Everything's a whirlwind, I can't focus or look at anything in particular, it's like being in the center of a tornado. Sure, everything's fine in the center, but beyond is nothin' but chaos. Really creepy chaos. Geez, I gotta find somewhere to lay down, I'm so tired, and hungry...I don't think I've eaten in days, but I can't remember anymore. I can't really remember much of anything, but I know it was all pretty damn unpleasant. I think I'll just be thankful for now.  
  
I start forward again without really moving. I'm not sure where exactly I'm headed. A vague whisper tells me 'away', but that's pretty damn unspecific, huh? It's okay, I'll deal. I've dealt with much worse before, haven't I?....Gee, I'm not actually sure...stupid memory lapse. Well, look on the bright side....Yeah, yeah keep lookin', it'll turn up eventually....at least I'm hoping so.  
  
Why the hell do I feel so lost? Sure, I don't know where I am, or hell, who I am, but that's no reason to panic, huh? Okay, maybe it is, but I'm not really down with that, don't need to waste any precious time freakin' out and bawling like a four year old. Shit....I think I'm already doing that. Worst part is I have no clue why the hell I'm crying...I really shouldn't be, I mean, I can't even remember why I'm crying, so what's with the tears? Might be something to do with the current identity crisis. Sure, that kinda thing is probably enough to scramble anyone's brains.  
  
Why do I keep on talking to myself when I don't believe a damn word I'm saying? Waste of breath.  
  
Geez...it's like the whole internal monologue doesn't have a pause button, 'cause here I am still yappin' away with myself and no reason to be. I'm not even saying anything interesting....I'm a regular snooze-fest. .....I really wanna sleep now....  
  
Ouch. That hurt. Okay, I'm looking around and things are actually staying still for once. Nice. Pretty. I don't think I'm here for the scenery though. It's a store. It has a little picture of a turtle on the sign. Cute, definitly cute. Why the hell am I here? I think it's probably past closing hours, but what the hell, I'm walking in. Gee...I'm moving on my own again, at least it feels that way. The bell on the door makes a really nice sound as I walk inside, kinda high-pitched and all tinkly....Ugh, I think I'm having a meltdown here, it's just a freaking bell....need sleep.  
  
......huh?......  
  
Okay....I'm being hugged by some kid with really funny hair. Can't be natural....gotta give his stylist credit though, that's an excellent dye job...I think. No one can have hair like that from birth? Doesn't matter, gotta stop paying attention to the small things...although the kid is pretty small...does that count for anything? Maybe we should deal with the hugging thing, I don't think I'm liking it, the whole touching and stuff....uncomfortable. My head's all whooshy now and...oh great...sure, I'm kneeling on the floor sobbing like a baby and hugging the hell outta the kid in front of me. Get a grip.  
  
He's looking down at me with the hugest eyes I've ever seen before, and he's trying to murmur something, well, soothing I guess....I'm not really doing much in the way of responding. I'm doing an excellent job of crying. Ain't I proud....world class crier, I am. He's pulling back and looking at me still....damn, I want him to close his eyes....he's seeing me. Like, really, SEEING me. It's creepy. He's looking inside me and I'm not liking it. It's a really weird feeling. His lips are moving, but the sound is coming out really slow and garbled. I'm trying not to listen I think....it's working pretty good for me.  
  
I came all the way here, where ever here is, and now I wanna go. I don't like this helpless feeling, I'm supposed to be stronger than this.....aren't I? I wish I knew....no, I don't....damn it.....I wish I at least knew what the hell I want. Don't suppose that'd be enough, huh?  
  
"Oh god....Jounouchi-kun...."  
  
"....................ugh." damn it. Damn it. Yeah, yeah, that's my freakin' name, I remember.....why'd you have to go and remind me Yugi? Sure....kinda confusing without memories, but nice in a simple way. I really didn't want to remember, I liked the fuzziness better....or even the blurriness....they each had their good points. I'm holding my head in my hands and trembling like some fraidy cat, and Yugi's going spastic on me, asking me questions and a whole bunch of other shit. Couldn't he give me a minute or two to pick my somewhat tenous sanity up off the floor?  
  
"Jounouchi......" he's being really quiet suddenly, and scared....shit. I know that look.  
  
I'm up and on him before he can move. I'm so not letting this happen again. He's small and easy to tackle, even in my kinda off state. I reach back to lock the door and hoist Yugi over my shoulder as I head upstairs. I don't hear gramps around anywhere, which is probably good. I don't wanna have to knock him out too. Yugi's room hasn't changed...though I ain't surprised. How long has it been since I was last here? I can't be sure, but since the calander says June, at least a month and a half. I think I went away in April...went away, how cute. Yeah, I got kidnapped, raped and sent to a looney bin, but all I can really think is 'I went away'.  
  
Ouch. Okay, those thoughts hurt. I drop Yugi on the bed and I'm falling again. I think I'm doing that way too much lately. Bad things are floating in front of my eyes, things that hurt bad. I'm balling my fists for all I'm worth until I feel my fingernails bite into my flesh....I dunno why, but that makes me feel a bit better....I'm more here now, more real.....all that other stuff is heading back to the past where it belongs I hope. The colours fade back and I'm just sitting in Yugi's room again, like I was a minute before. Yugi is still knocked out on the bed....I don'y think I meant to hit him that hard....hell, I don't remember hitting him...I must've though, right? You don't just randomly go unconscious....okay, so I have a few times lately, but Yugi's not like that....he's normal. Well, sort of at least.  
  
I hope he's got some asprin, my head's killing me...almost in a litteral way...kinda freaky come to think of it. I walk into the bathroom and up to the sink, there has to be some medicine around here somewhere, I think....  
  
"Are you.... J-Jounouchi!"  
  
Okay, Yugi's awake and freaking out on me. How the hell did that happen....how long have I been in the bathroom? His eyes are like saucers....well, even more so than usual. What the hell is his problem?? Good question...what's he looking at? Well, one way to find out, so I'll look where he's looking....why am I just talking about it, why aren't I doing it? I don't think I wanna look. Nope, I don't. For once, I think I'm pretty certain about something. No looking...no looking...no looki--shit.  
  
I'm looking, I'm soooo looking, and it's not that pleasant. I'm not really sure how this happened. I've got my hands out in the sink and one of them is holding a knife....hmmm, familiar.....ugh.....nope, don't wanna go there, not gonna think about that stuff. There's an awful lot of blood just laying around on the counter and in the sink itself, even with the water running it ain't all disappearing.....tha probably means there's a lot of it, huh? Oh yeah....could be because I seemed to have freakin' mutilated myself. Why'd I go and do that? Sure, the patterns are really nice and all, I do have great artistic sense, but this probably wasn't one of my better ideas....flesh doesn't seem to work well as a canvass.  
  
That thought brings up a lot of pain...and redness.....no. no. I'm not doing this, not now. please?  
  
I'm falling again...I hate when that happens. I think I blacked out, 'cause now my arm is all wrapped in bandages and gauze and I'm on a bed. I don't like it so I'm sitting up...I'm trying to sit up...I seem to be having technical problems at the moment....okay....rolling works. Floor. yup, this is the floor alright. Score one for me. Now to get to the door.....  
  
Oops....Yugi just rushed in and he's all upset...gee, he's crying. Come on, that's not gonna help much! That might mean more if I weren't crying too....oh well, so I'm a hypocrit. He's fussing and checking the dressings on my arm, and I'm staring up at the ceiling. It's not terribly interesting. He's trying for all he's worth to get me back on the bed, but it's just not happenin', how the hell did he get me there in the first place?  
  
There's this really cool light show going on all of a sudden....don't know how I ever could've missed it before. Yup...there is the wonderful Pharaoh in all his leather clad glory, kneeling beside me and dragging me up on the bed. Did I really think I look better in leather than he does....hmm, not sure, it'd be a close contest. He certainly does gold a lot better. Shiny, very shiny...that glowy thing on his head....Damn. He's peeking inside my head right now isn't he? How come whenever there's someone looking in on us that we're at our worst? I'm trying pretty hard not to think of any bad things, but I think the whole badly decorated in blood is pretty much telling him that I'm in bad shape, in both a physical and mental sense. Probably metaphysical as well...that's probably what he's spying on me for. He wants to see if anyone put some badass hoodoo on me....don't I just wish it? Nice little counter-spell and then, poof! Back to being me...not that I'm not me right now....I'm not going down this path, especially not if he's listening in on me. Why is it we find out the cool powers about every other item we come across, but Yugi's pretty tight lipped about the puzzle....you'd think he'd tell his friends what kinda cool things he can do.  
  
If he could've helped me on that math test last semester and didn't I'll be so pissed, my dad freakin'.....ugh. Not thinking that either. Gotta keep track of the things I ain't supposed to be thinking about. Death, blood, my dad, cutting, rape, Master.....oh shit. I didn't say that....uh, think that, did I?  
  
Yugi....or the Pharaoh is looking really funny right about now. The glowy third eye thing disappeared. I'm not sure if it's because he got frustrated and gave up, or if he got all he needed outta my head. Please don't be the second possibility, Master'd kill me....ugh.....no. No. No. Not thinking these things. He's probably still tied to that stupid chair anyways....Unless that security guard got curious and came up to look in on us....well, not us, since I ain't there anymore.  
  
"He's gonna call the freaking cops when he finds Master and then he'll have the whole power of the damn Kaiba corp out hunting me down....I have to get out of here....."  
  
Yugi is blinking....a lot. Did I say that out loud....Oh kami-sama I DIDN'T!!!! He's holding me down, and considering how bad I'm freaking out on him, he's doing a good job...then again, I've lost a lot of blood. Well, whose fault is that? No time for blame right now....just gotta go....really gotta go. If he hears that I told Yugi....okay, sure it was an accident, but I doubt he'd care....ugh, it's worse than the dog pound for me.  
  
I'm laughing....hysterically. Gee, it wasn't really all that funny....just a well timed dog pun....Master would've liked it.....okay, a little funny maybe....  
  
I stop laughing after awhile and quiet down, while staring up at the ceiling. Yugi is still sitting on the edge of the bed. He's all tense and angry, I can tell. Oh yeah....that's his 'revenge face'....probably not a good sign. He stands and walks to the door, and he's mumbling something to me as he leaves. Shit. Must. Get. Up. NOW.  
  
I'm on two feet....what a novelty. Sure, the room is on a forty-five degree angle from normal, but it's a start. One foot in front of the other....next foot...okay, it feels like I'm walking through water...or maybe deep snow....not the time to make comparisons....Yugi's stopped at the door and has one hand out in front of me, he's telling me to take it easy I think....sure it'd be nice to lay down right now and have a nap....didn't I want that just a little while ago? Got more important things on my mind. If he goes to Master and demands some kind of explanation about why I was ranting about him....well, actually, Master's a good liar. Then again, if Yugi finds him still attached to the chair...not to mention the blood...I can see things going so downhill from there.  
  
What the hell am I supposed to do? On one hand, a part of me wants to see Yugi kick the crap outta Kaiba....now another part of my mind is getting mad at me for saying 'Kaiba'...there it goes again....ugh, naw, I really just want to stop all this right here and now and deal with it another day. Well, no, I don't want to have to deal at all, I'd like to wake up and everybody just say 'thing's are alright now, let's go get some burgers'....I need to eat....Somehow I don't think things are gonna happen the way I'd like 'em to. Gotta stop Yugi from going out then.....no way can I let him and Kaiba/Master (does that work, calling him by both names....no little voices are yelling at me....)get in the same room together. I somehow think one wouldn't make it out alive....although, damned to admit it, but I'm curious who would win....  
  
Must stop Yugi...he's turning back to the door....  
  
I'm brilliant....absolutely fucking spectacular. He's shorter than me, which is kinda uncomfortable, I'm used to looking up to kiss Kaiba/Master....but still, very nice. His mouth is really soft and warm, and he isn't fighting or being all pushy.....it's kinda sweet. Yup....he aint goin' nowhere. He's looking up at me with huge violet eyes....kinda nice and all shocked/adoring....at least I'm hoping there's some adoration going on in there....hmmm....I wonder....If I push this any further does it count as a threesome?  
  
No time like the present to find out......  
  
I'm so screwed up.  
  
*****  
  
A/N: First note, Jou knocked out Yugi 'cause he thought Yugi was going to go call the hospital or police. He really didn't mean to hit him, he was just trying to stop him from going to call anyone. Jou doesn't want to go back. Second, just because Jou kissed Yugi, doesn't actually mean that they're about to have sex....not that Jou isn't about to try....we just don't know what Yugi was thinking during and after the kiss. That's why I ended right there. I'm not sure if anything will happen with them, I don't think I'm done with Kaiba though either. To be honest, even I'm not sure what will happen, this story just took on a life of it's own somewhere around chapter three. Scary.  
  
See ya! 


	7. Haunted

A/N: Oooohhhh.... if anyone though a few chapters of Fierce Child got confusing, I think I actually managed to top myself here. Most of the reason lies in the fact that none of these were written together, each a different day and in a different order, I just chose to patch em all together now. It swings between past and present. If anyone is confused enough to need a roadmap e-mail me, just check my profile, it's in there. Sorry for the long wait too, but I hope a certain section of this chapter will make up for it. I didn't know I could actually write it. This chapter isn't for the squeemish. Sorry also for such a long hiatus, I've just had a hard time getting going and finishing this, I had the squish part written long ago, it was what to put around it that eluded me. I'm not sure if I'm happy with this, I'm not sure if I ever could be. We do the best we can.  
  
***  
  
Ending: Haunted  
  
***  
  
I blinked "What?" I asked groggily as I was being shaken from behind by two sets of small hands. I knew of course who those hands belonged to, Yugi and his Yami. It was odd to see them and feel them both at the same time, they were so different, but still so much the same. It was kinda freaky, but in an exciting way. Two of them...it was pretty intoxicating and I felt myself grinning like an idiot at the thought.  
  
Then again, they seemed pretty taken with the arragement themselves. Who knew?  
  
I felt a soft kiss of my cheek and I knew that it was Yugi. Yugi always tended to be more submissive, never too forward, Yami on the other hand prefered to be aggressive. Despite my arguments they had both decided that Yami was to keep his hands off at most times. I was up for a little aggression, I really didn't mind, but they had other ideas. I think it had something to do with 'healing', but I was feeling pretty good. Random badness happens to the best of us, but oh well, we deal. Still, Yami kept his hands off of me, which was a somewhat disatisfying quality in a lover. Freak had a thing with watching though, he certainly seemed to enjoy it.  
  
Maybe I'm the freak, 'cause hey, I kinda like it too. Not that I would mind some serious groping without all the eyeballin'. Serious, just touch me already!  
  
I sighed lightly and rolled over to stare up into the sweet violet eyes of my best friend and now lover. Strange how things work out, huh? I really hadn't seen this one coming at me, but it certainly felt alright. They both walked around me on eggshells though.  
  
I guess there just might be happy endings after all, wasn't I proof of it?  
  
Of course, it was a naive lie, the problem was in the fact that I believed it.  
  
I tried to.  
  
****  
  
I sat in dark silence, enjoying the cool feeling of the leather that I was currently encased in. I caught myself wondering idly how the fabric could feel so warm and cold on me at the same time. Not that it mattered, it was comfortable and nice, I liked the feeling of it clinging to me as if in need. Damn. There I go again, anthropomorphizing. Neat word, huh? Saw it on a word-a-day calendar in the principals office during one of my many sojourns there...not that I was the most trouble prone student even, but I certainly spent enough time there that it was a familiar sort of place.  
  
I was waiting in the shadows not really doing much of anything, just waiting patiently. I found it interesting to note that Kaiba had a personal doctor on staff. Came right to the house with one of those nifty medical bags and was escorted right on into the mansion complex. I guess they weren't monitering the gates, or maybe nobody cared, and that's how I waltzed in so easily like I owned the place. Nice feeling, wish it were true. If I had enough money to blow I'd buy myself a swimming pool full of jello. I've seen that little weird fantasy come up in many places, I want to know if it's as cool as people seem to want to think it is. I kinda doubt it, but hell, I'm up for a surprise or two.  
  
In case anyone's curious I'd buy a slushee machine next. Or hell, my own private fast food restaurant. Why was it that all my fantasies seem to lean in the general direction of my stomach? food fixation? Then again, considering what they served at the hospital who could blame me really for wanting something of quality. As soon as I got the chance I was going to raid the Kaiba family kitchen, money-bags would certainly have something good to eat in there I bet.  
  
What? Hmmm....yeah, so I can call him what I want to now, I get it. He's not my fucking Master, or Kaiba-sama as his employees call him, he's what ever the hell I want to name him. I have a few choice petnames that I already came up with, I'm looking forward to trying them out.  
  
And there he goes, the doc is back and on his way. Patience pays off once more. I hop down off my tree branch and onto the cool grass. I smile and brush my hands a few times across the well manicured lawn to rid them of claminess. I'm nervous, can you blame me? So I happen to get really clammy hands, it's not my fault, at least I'm taking care of it. I'm sure his super-fussiness would hate it if my hands were all wet and cold on him. I'm suddenly wondering why in the hell I wiped my hands off.  
  
I'm not sure next about what I'm going to do. Yeah, I'm going to go in there and have a little heart to heart with Kaiba, but about what? I'm not sure. 'Hi, I'm sorry I raped you a few nights ago, but hey, you started it!'....somehow that lacks the proper emotions for what I'm feeling. I'm currently thinking more along the lines of 'ready to die, bitch?', but that smacks of melodrama. I'm not sure what's coming, but hell, I'm prepared. Got my treasure chest of goodies that I'm so hoping to play with on Kaiba, I'm sure he'll enjoy in some sick masochistic way.  
  
Then again, aren't I the masochist? Looking at the miles of bandages wrapped snuggly around my arms screams out an undenyable 'yes!'. The bandages were Yugi's idea, he seems to have problems with the sight of blood. I kinda like it myself, it's a vibrant colour. I guess it reminds me that I'm still here, there's still some life left in me even after what was taken from me.  
  
I'm anxious and my heart is pounding, but I'm still taking steps forward, kinda shambling, trying to look cool, like I know what the hell I'm doing. That, of course, is a huge lie. I have no clue what I'm heading into, what I'm going to do once I see him again. I gotta keep going though, I have to see.  
  
A sick part of me wants to know if there's any fear in those cold blue eyes.  
  
I'm in the house and so far so good, if anyone's seen me they aren't doing anything to stop me. I can't help but wonder if they do know I'm here and Kaiba just told them to do nothing to stop me. He just might, he's weird like that. I'm amazed I haven't gotten lost yet, but it's like there's some homing instict drawing me forward, I can almost feel him through the walls, his heart beating, the rise and fall of his breathing, I just know he's ahead of me. My feelings lead me to a fairly plain wood door, no decorations or clues to say that something important waits inside, but I know it does. He's here.  
  
I push the door open slowly, not that Kaiba would permit any of his doors to squeek, that'd be too disrespectful, all his possessions must maintain a quiet dignity like their owner. Scary thing is, despite my own admitted past craziness, I'm half certain Kaiba may actually think like this. Spooky.  
  
He's laying still and peaceful in his rather oversized bed, his hair brushed nicely and the covers tucked in carefully around him. There's a bottle on his night table, I can't read the medical term, but I think it's gotta be a sleeping pill or something, maybe a tranquilizer. I'm surprized Kaiba would actually let someone make him take sleep meds, it's not like him. Kaiba must hate being forced into defenslessness. I'm kind of liking it.  
  
I reach out and brush gently at the bangs that cover his forhead and lean in to kiss him softly. He doesn't look like such a bastard when he's asleep. Odd how sleep and death make everyone look okay, like they perfect little angels. Sure, this is fairly cliche, but hell, if it's true, so be it. After I make myself all nice and cozy on the edge of his bed I slap him.  
  
No, I don't think I actually thought of it, I just did it. More of this instinctive stuff again. I toy momentarily with the idea of simply smothering him, and I go so far as to pick up a pillow.  
  
Gee, this is almost as nice as seeing fear in his eyes, good ol' Kaiba is sleeping with a gun. Doesn't he know how dangerous that is? He really oughtta be careful, after all, what if Mokuba found it. Well, okay, Mokuba's probably too damn smart to go messing around with a gun if he found it, afterall he has bodyguards who carry all the time, I'm sure he knows how to use one properly. Kaiba would've made sure to teach Mokuba, just in case you ever get kidnapped but some sort of sadistic torturer.....  
  
Ugh, my head hurts.  
  
It sounds like an awfully nice idea though.  
  
****  
  
"Jounouchi-kun??" Yugi called out quietly into the room, huge eyes searching out for his blonde haired friend. He was already fairly certain Jounouchi wasn't there, he wasn't going to answer, but Yugi felt he had to make a token effort before allowing panic to set in.  
  
Jounouchi had first come to him a little over a week ago, kinda lost and confused. Yugi thought he was doing better though, that he'd recovered a little. Jou wouldn't talk about how he busted out of the hospital, but he was secretly glad. It hadn't been good for him, if anything it had screwed him up worst. The police hadn't given them a choice though, they simply took him, they said he needed to be watched. The doctors said he was dangerous to himself and still needed to be watched. Yugi just though Jou needed his friends.  
  
Yami thought Yugi was being a little too naive and idealistic. Sure, in a perfect world being surrounded by the people who cared for you most could cure everything. The real world though was a bitch about such things, and even friendship and love weren't always enough. Something was seriously wrong with the shaggy haired blonde, some deep part of him had been broken into pieces and nothing was fitting back into place properly. Yami sighed somewhat dismally, noting almost all of his metaphors came in terms of puzzles to be fixed.  
  
Yugi sat down heavily on his bed and stared up at the ceiling. Jou had been coming and going for th past few days. Sometimes he'd be there, and sometimes not, occassionally he'd suddenly come up behind Yugi and frighten the hell out of him. Instictively Yugi would hug him and bury his face in Jou's chest and hope that maybe now everything was going to be fine, that this time Jou would just stay put. It hadn't happened so far. He always came back eventually, usually covered in cuts and scrapes, Yami was fairly certain most of the wounds were self-inflicted, but Yugi tried to deny it, tried to believe he knew his best friend better than that, knew Jou wouldn't be capable of such things.  
  
Yami wasn't so sure either of them knew who Jounouchi really was anymore, what he'd become. His eyes were far away and distant, filled with pain and anger. Such things were to be expected, what made Yami nervous was the darkness swirling through the blonde's mind, the dark thoughts and deeds that claimed more and more of his soul each day. He was afraid that one day Jounouchi Katsuya would no longer exist and some souless monster would be standing in his place.  
  
To think such a thing could happen to the boy they both knew so well once, both loved, it was hard to bear, and Yami chose to do so alone. He sheltered Yugi from the darkness in Jou as much as possible, tried to keep Yugi from seeing what was really happening. Most of all, Yami refused to let Jounouchi kiss Yugi, he could see in Jou's eyes how much such things meant to him, how dependant he was upon affection now, but how shadowed and hateful his eyes became when he was touched. The spirit was becoming more and more certain that is Jou couldn't be rescued from himself and soon, then there would be nothing left within him to save.  
  
****  
  
I'm floating in nothingness, a sea of darkness and light swirling around me, through me. Colours and shapes loom up before my eyes but I can't make sense of any of it. Th images fade to black and begin again. I'm in new places with new people. I'm off balance, I never know what's coming next. It's like a dream only you know it's a dream and you can't control what's happening and all your worst fears are coming true. The only problem I have is that I don't think this is a dream.  
  
The light grows dim and fades, the darkness overpowering it for the moment. It feels like my head is in a vice, that something is pressing hard against my brain and as it tightens i lose more and more of myself. It's frigtening and I want to cry out. I wanted Yugi to come and save me, to help me. Wherever I am he can't hear me, no one can. I'm lost an alone and this darkness is feeding off me, it's stealing away everything that matters until I feel empty and alone.  
  
Nothing matters, not Yuugi, not Yami. My friends are meanigless, small images that have been pushed away from me. I shiver against the coldness inside, but it makes no difference. More images shuffle across my view and I begin to walk forward. Some small part of me whispers against what I'm doing but I quash it. I have to, what I do I do to protect myself. It's far and distant, quiet and cold like myself. It's here waiting and I can feel myself trembling with anticipation. All thoughts of those I might of once loved are now unimportant, all that matters is what waits for me behind the door.  
  
My secret, my treasure, the thing that defines me now and gives me meaning, and he is waiting. I brought him here, from where I can't remember, the place gives me nightmares, but I know why I brought him.  
  
It fills me with disgust and self loathing. And lust.  
  
Without truly knowing myself or who I once might have been I knew from now on I was a monster. The things I would do to him....the worst part was it wasn't for vengance, it wasn't for hatred. It was about need.  
  
And perhaps love. In a sick and twisted way this is the kind of love he taught me about, love that requires great sacrifice. I took those sacrifices from his body, I took the things he needed most. I broke him and mad him into something that pleased me, something that depended upon me.  
  
I love him, if monsters can feel love. I'm not sure anymore.  
  
****  
  
I was with Yugi when we got the news, it was shocking, utterly shocking. The last thing anyone could have expected, certainly not from our resident arrogent SOB, namely Kaiba.  
  
Gone. Poof. Vanished. Not even a word to Mokuba before he dissappeared.  
  
Well, considering how he reappeared, that last part wasn't all that much of a shock.  
  
Funny thing, the cops think it was the same phatom rapist who got to me. Isn't that a strange idea? They're still looking for me too. Yuugi thinks I should go to the cops and tell them what happened to me, maybe that'll help them find who did it. They might even be willing to overlook the fact I stabbed somebody. Sure, the nurse lived, but I doubt it'll look good for me if I go in and outright say it to them. After being locked up in that damn white hospital I don't look eagerly upon going to jail. It'll just be another cage, only grey instead of white. I think jail would be grey, I'm not sure why though.  
  
Yuugi tries to get answers out of me himself, but I just avoid it and try to kiss him into insesibility. I found that methos works well on both of them. It gives me an hour or so of peace to think though. Well, no, I mean I do think about Yuugi during sex and stuff, but other things too. I have to, if I don't...I don't want to hurt Yuugi, not ever. I have to keep focussed.  
  
It's getting harder, when he touches me I want to scream or cry, I can't be sure of which anymore. I can feel his warmth and it terrifies me, it's so unlike what I'm used to. I want to drowned in his warmth like it will cure me, but I already know it won't. I'm afraid if I try I'll just drag him down with me, and I don't want that either. There's not really any way to win in this situation.  
  
I'm losing at this whole thing. Normally I would say things could only get better from here, I'd get ready to pull some miracle out of my hat and things would be all magically perfect again. I really wish I could manage that, but I know that sometimes it just isn't possible. I don't care if you call me a quitter, because it would be the truth. I've quit, given up. I lost.  
  
Last night I lost it all and I'm paying for it with my soul.  
  
**** (DISTURBING, IF YOU ARE SQUEEMISH TURN BACK NOW!!!!-Ryan-ookami)  
  
He whimpered once in the dark as the bright silver bit deeply into the soft flesh below his nipple. I reached down eagerly with my mouth and took the torn skin delicately to touch my lips. I sucked lightly as I took it in, the taste of his skin, light and salty, mixing in with it the coppery fire of his blood. Shivers ran through me as I drew more from him, my tongue ghosting lightly across the cut. He whimpered once, low in his throat, the startled frightened cry of an animal as the predator toyed with it.  
  
It was nice to know he finally understood me. After all, hadn't he made me?  
  
I nipped softly at his chest as I slowly pulled back from his flesh, I had left it swollen and bright red, the blood still winding it's path down the silken cream of his skin. He was so pale and thin, his lank lean body stretched out like a white heaven below me.  
  
I'd hated that all encompassing white that drowned the hospital ward, but this was different. My own personal space of pale silvery white gleaming in the dark shadows of the room. It was all for me and no one else now. No one else would ever know how it was to feel that skin beneath their body, perfect and smooth, to have his body as their own.  
  
He was mine now, and mine forever. He would think of me, breath for me, live for me. By my will he would live or die. For my pleasure he would do whatever I asked.  
  
I gently licked the crimson stain from the edge of my blade, delighted by the fear and hurt in those shattered blue eyes, wide and staring up at me, all attention focused on me. I owned his thoughts, his body, but not his heart. I knew he wanted me, wanted my heart, but I denied it to him. I didn't particularily care about whether or not he loved me, what did his love matter? I knew I loved him, but from him? I simply wanted to know that his body attuned to me, everything he was, his essence focused on me. I wanted him to pay attention to his lessons, after all, there might be a test later.  
  
I laughed quietly into the shadows, and he spasmed beneath me, his body giving way to fear and pleasure. I could do both, I could be both. I was his everything now. I leaned in and kissed him along his jaw, nibbling my way to his ears and lingering lovingly on his earlobe as my hands tangled in his hair. He jerked away in pain as I bit into the delicate skin, yet again drawing blood. I seemed to be doing a lot of that lately. I grabbed a nearby cloth that was waiting and gently washed away the blood, both fresh and clotted, from his ear. I blew softly and wordlessly into it afterwards and he moaned shaplessly in pain. I was almost afraid he'd just start bleeding on me again. I prefered it when I was doing the cutting, the blood seemed somehow in the way while I was trying to tend to my playmate afterwards.  
  
I kissed him once more, deeply and passionately, my tongue demanding entrance to his empty mouth. A small pained whimper built up in his chest but it was swallowed by the kiss and died between us. I clutched roughly at the sides of his head, my fingers playing with his ears harshly. I knew how fresh the pain must still be for him there, how he jerked away violently, only to get nowhere. I could feel blood on my fingertips and knew he still had fresh blood to give, but time was ticking away. Places to go and things to be.  
  
He'd already received his pleasure for the day, and I was content with mine for now. I might come back later if I felt like it. I didn't come every night, I tried my best to keep him off guard, never knowing when to expect one of my periodic visits. All in all, it worked out nicely. With that done, I left him in the dark of the small shed to look up into the shadows with frightened blue eyes.  
  
I never grew tired of that shade of blue.  
  
***  
  
What was happening to me? I couldn't tell anymore. Each day I lost more of myself, forgot more of myself. Each night I tried to give what was left to Yugi. I was leaving myself behind and it terrified me. I did my best to console myself against Yugi's soft skin, but I couldn't help what happened I couldn't stop what I was becoming, the things I had done, the monster he'd made of me.  
  
Yugi looked so small and vulnerable beside me, his body curled tightly against mine. He was achingly beautiful and I wanted to wake him up again and tell him that much, make him know how loved and desired he was. He deserved that, he decerved more than me. More than who I was now.  
  
Shadows still churned in my heart and I craved them at times, the freedom that embracing them gave, the way it expiated my pain, the way I could funnel it all out into his body. Kaiba. The things I'd done....Oh god, no matter what he had done to me, it didn't make my own actions right, but I kept doing it anyways.  
  
The police thought he'd disappeared, been kidnapped like I was. I knew they would like to have interviewed me, to try and find out more about my captor, they thought Kaiba was a victim of the same predator. In a way he was, he was a victim of the pain he'd caused me, of the person he'd shaped me into. So the police were on the look out for me, although it might have something to do with the nurse I stabbed. I honestly don't recall doing it, my mind hurts to think of it, but I'm still certain it's true. At least she survived, not that it makes me any less guilty, but it's something small at least.  
  
I sigh into the night and stare out through the skylight over Yugi's desk. It's an akward angle from where I'm laying, but I need to see the stars for a bit. Of course, there aren't any out tonight, I guess they've decided to hide from me. Hell, I'd hide from me if I could.  
  
Then again, I know what I've done, do the stars? Does Yugi? If he knows how can he touch me? It hurts to let him, knowing what I am and what I've done. I come back home to him and pretend as though nothing is wrong and I let him come to me anyway. I think that's what makes it worse, that I say nothing and let him love me, let him try to rescue me even though there is no coming back, no one can save me.  
  
***  
  
He had been found naked, tied down to a chair, the bonds digging into his flesh tightly like he had tried to escape, pull free. His blue eyes stared upwars blankly, not seeing, never seeing again. Dried blood had pooled beneath him on the floor, an ugly brown stain now, rather than the bright crimson of fresh blood.  
  
It was none of this however which made the young cop run from the small shed and get sick in the bushes outside.  
  
He had almost tripped upon the small bit of naked flesh and not knowing what it was he'd shined down his flashlight and stared at it with eerie fascination. His heart beat faster and he knew with sudden shock he was looking at a tongue. It had simply been tossed aside almost casually, far too casually. The cop ran and couldn't help it. Later, when more seasoned veterans showed up a better understanding of the case was come to, only to be written down in small scratchy script on a notepad already filled with horrors from dozens of other crimes.  
  
The rookie cop quit the force soon afterwards, his first case having been unbareable to stand. He still woke nights, hearing the soundless screams of the poor boy found tied silent and deaf to the world, the terror still a gleam in the dead glazed eyes. He would never forget that first sight, and the word Master etched deeply in the boy's flesh, the bright crimson of his blood standing out so brilliantly from his pale dead chest.  
  
No one came away unhaunted.  
  
***  
  
A/N: The end. If you have any questions or unresolved issues from this story, well, yeah, you're supposed to. It wasn't meant to be wrapped up nicely. Jou is a monster, he loves Yuugi and wants to be with him but can't escape the thing inside that Kaiba made him into. Will Jou ever be better? Will Yuugi ever find out what Jou did to Kaiba? Who knows, it isn't for me to say. For now all we'll ever know is that a monster sleeps hungry in Yuugi's bed. Whether it will continue to feed is something only the stars can guess at. 


End file.
